Random
Source Code
Random
Beard food is food that is embedded in one’s beard while eating unbeknownst to the eater
Dude! Did you eat tacos for lunch? You have some beard food in your whiskers. Are you saving it for later?
Achieving this attractive facial feature is usually only acquired by some of the most loathsome trailer trash the world has ever seen. Having a large grouping of cigarette burns around the facial hair area due to the smoker falling asleep while smoking laying down and causing severe burns in the shape of a beard and mustache after many painful years of waking up to find yet another burn for the beard..Many styles are known to exist.
Hillbilly Bob fell asleep that night with yet another cigarette in his mouth.The hum of the exhaust fan drown out his screams when he awoke to the smell of burning flesh and nicotine in the air..Luckily for him the burn filled in a spot in his hard earned cigarette beard.
A beard grown after being laid off, due to the lack of need to maintain a certain caliber of appearance. Most commonly found during recession, or other forms of economic depression, when jobs are lost en masse. The loss of job makes the unemployed male down in the dumps, and the laziness makes him less likely to shave.
Tom: I lost my job at the auto plant a few weeks ago.
Bill: So, that would explain that scrappy thing on your jaw.
Tom: Yeah, it's my Recession Beard. Is it really that scrappy?
47👍 3👎
A slang term for a set of hairy testicles.
"She played amazing grace on my bearded bagpipes all night."
"I heard you deflated your bearded bagpipes all over your mom's face."
"Too bad she choked on my bearded bagpipes before I could play her a song."
When you unintentionally grow out your facial hair because for multiple nights you’re too tired/lazy/depressed to shave
Person 1: Why are you growing out your beard?
Person 2: I’m not, this just a depression beard
Euphemism for a moment in time (typically in pop culture) where something or someone that was lackluster and/or underachieving suddenly and surprisingly became much better and exciting. Taken from Star Trek - The Next Generation, which many fans considered wanting until Commander Riker grew a beard at the start of Season Two, after which the show was solid and well-received for the rest of its run.
"Heather Locklear joining the cast of Melrose Place was that show's Riker's Beard moment."
"Ben Cherrington (Boston Red Sox GM) trading expensive malcontents like Carl Crawford and Josh Beckett to the LA Dodgers was a Riker's Beard for his career (and the Red Sox) if ever I saw one."
"Little did the New England Patriots know it at the time, but when Mo Lewis knocked Drew Bledsoe out in Week 2 of 2001, it would become a Riker's Beard for the franchise."
"The fact that Danny Ainge (Boston Celtics GM) turned getting boned in the 2008 NBA Draft Lottery into a Riker's Beard is still staggering to me."
278👍 27👎
Greatest season ever, time of year when it is not necessary to shave due to any reason at all
Dan: So Steve you haven't shaved in a while whats up?
Steve: Well Dan its that time of year you know beard season.
52👍 3👎