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calorie

a pointless unit of measurement to dwell over my lovelies

them: "omg that's so high calorie! ive eaten enough anyway"
me: "that's true, but calories don't matter, so please allow yourself to enjoy the food if and when you want it"

by giantphallussedlady May 8, 2022


Calorie

Invisible food math

You: “Dude, what’s a Calorie?”

Me (an educated guy): “Basically, it’s invisible food math.”

by Jjoshyy69420 March 12, 2023


Calorie queen

A women who is fat & ugly and gay

Bro did you see how much Calorie queen arwen ate at Burger King?

by 🐮🐮 February 4, 2023


calorie cloud

The act of burning calories and donating them to kids who need them most.

I totally calorie clouded that burger from lunch today when I went for an afternoon run.

by lukecycles May 10, 2017


It's fun, calorie-free, and won't get you pregnant

A good line to use wif a cute chick when ya wanna do something totally "innocent 'n' harmless" like rub her feet, give her a cuddly soothing massage, etc.

Telling a hot gal dat "It's fun, calorie-free, and won't get you pregnant" can also be effective for getting her to allow you total access to her warm softness wif your hands and lips, provided dat you are actually able to "keep it in your pants" (or at least just in her hand or mouth, if you're both naked). Good luck wif DAT, though --- once you get excited from savoring her exquisite flesh, her juicy-looking coochie may look awfully tempting for your painfully-engorged lulu! What you can do in dis case, though, is to either wear a condom or have her "relieve da pressure" manually/orally, and then you can safely thrust inside of her for at least a few minutes before your sperm-glands "recharge themselves" to da point where you would again be in danger of spurting helplessly while you're eagerly "soothing her baby-tunnel" wif your swollen "love-pipe".

by QuacksO December 12, 2019


It's easy, fun, free, legal, calorie-free, and won't get you pregnant

How you describe a proposed recreational activity to a girl to alleviate most of her "automatic" (i.e., uncertainties that would typically occur to her "right off the bat" whenever anything unfamiliar is suggested to her) concerns .

Telling a cutie that, "It's easy, fun, free, legal, calorie-free, and won't get you pregnant" when you wanna give her an "all over" massage is fine and dandy,. but how can you be so sure that this will all be true? I mean, just **you** try and "keep it in your pants" when you have a luscious-fleshed girl lying naked and submissive in front of you!

by QuacksO January 4, 2020


calorie whore

someone who makes a conscious effort to count every calorie they consume in a day to the point where it becomes excessive.

Liv has become such a calorie whore.

by July 23, 2024