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Jesus

The man of peace, prosperity, and love. He an Moses defeated the Romans using Uzi's and saved the Jews from the Eygptians. My main man Jesus, Son of God.

Jesus is my main man.

by Lil R.D January 7, 2009

30๐Ÿ‘ 98๐Ÿ‘Ž


Jesus

A man who once wanted people to live in peace and harmony, and to love one another. Although, is now being used as a way to bash certain communities of people, mostly (gay) people. The group of people that do the bashing are, (Rednecks) and (Christians).

Get over it, if he wanted you all to fight, Jesus wouldn't of gotten himself killed.

by JearBear August 18, 2008

22๐Ÿ‘ 87๐Ÿ‘Ž


Jesus

Biggest cock in the world. Anyone named Jesus has a massive shlong and will slap you with his almighty cock if you disagree

โ€œWoah look at jesus and his bulgeโ€

by Good guy jesus October 26, 2020

32๐Ÿ‘ 98๐Ÿ‘Ž


Jesus

The cornerstone of the Christian religion.

I have thorns on my head and I'm underwater, but the blood is not flying into the water, but running down my face, because I am Jesus, and I am awesome.

by Magical Nigga November 10, 2005

45๐Ÿ‘ 120๐Ÿ‘Ž


Jesus

According to Christianity, God's son and the saviour of the world who will come again to judge the living and the dead (CORRECT). According to the Jews, a heretic who comited blasphmy (some Jews and Muslims see him as a major profit). Acording to athiest, some guy (WRONG). According to evangelicals, a way to guilt impresionable idiots into giving them money.

Even if you don't think Jesus is God's son and all, at least accept that he was a pretty cool guy with good ideas on how to live.

by northendwhitetrash June 26, 2007

41๐Ÿ‘ 109๐Ÿ‘Ž


Jesus

The second coming is here! Jesus is back in the form of Joel Zimmerman aka deadmau5!! We are saved!!

Jesus is back bitches!!

by Rellik Uzi August 18, 2010

102๐Ÿ‘ 226๐Ÿ‘Ž


Jesus

A Mexican male name of both Hebrew and Spanish origin. Pronounced "hey-zeus".

Jesus' are often times shy, guarded, and like to keep to themselves. However, when they find motivation to do something, they are the least shy people of all. Once comfortable with someone, although still guarded, they will open up a bit more.

They are known for their masculine looks and exasperated sighs. They are characterized by strong arm and bicep muscles which many find useful when pulling a woman in for a kiss. The skin of a Jesus is constantly warm to the touch unless they are outside for long periods of time in inappropriate clothing, such as at a high school football game in the end of October in a light jacket.

When they have a bad feeling about something, some may stay up throughout the night until they get bad new, like a phone call from a crying friend.

When a Jesus finds a girl, always a beauty in their eyes, there will either be terrible heartbreak or wondrous love. He will one day find a girl that adores his smiles and will get lost in his eyes. When they embrace, she'll wonder what has taken her so long to find this person. Both will realize just how much they love each other and how much they both want to spend the rest of their lives together.

When they no longer hold back, they become a great listener, a caring best friend, and a tender lover. Anyone who gets to know them for who they really are will either fall in love with them, or wish that they had him as a best friend.

I'm completely in love with my Jesus, who gives me affectionate kisses and holds me in his arms until I fall asleep.

I want to spend the rest of my life with Jesus, my best friend until the end.

Will you marry me, Jesus?

I can always count on Jesus to remember a certain moment that means a lot to them for years and years, possibly for the rest of him life. Certain objects, such as an AC/DC jacket, arcade tokens from a first date, or even a girl's dolphin necklace, are triggers for memories that sometimes keep him up at night.

Even though his family is bothersome to him, he is loyal and compassionate about every single one of them. He never lets a birthday go forgotten or unrecognized.

by DyingMelodies October 27, 2013

112๐Ÿ‘ 239๐Ÿ‘Ž