Random
Source Code
Random
The “Prince of Peace” in whose name countless have been slaughtered.
Jesus Christ: the poem.
Jesus.
The savior.
The light of the world.
The big cheese up in the sky.
Who was nailed to a cross, so we wouldn’t die.
1308👍 822👎
Spoken by a troubled soul, a person fluent in most heanus of sware words though due to a religous tendancy struggles to link 'Fuck' or 'Fucking' to his/her lord above blaspheme's..
Stjohn - "Margaret, why u aint cleaned my car bitch?"
Margaret "Jesus F Christ SJ, that cunting Landrover gets so dirty up our motherfucking mile long drive, do it ur fucking self"
16👍 19👎
a bad ass hippy. seriously, think about it, he whore sandles all the time, he had long ass hair and a beard, and he talked about peace and harmony. he was the idle tree hugger.
jesus christ is a stoner
169👍 109👎
A cosmic Jewish Zombie who was his own father and can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his flesh and telepathically tell him you accept him as your master, so he can remove an evil force from your soul that is present in humanity because a rib-woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat from a magical tree.
Damn, that guy Jesus Christ sure is bad-ass. He somehow managed to revive himself after being nailed to a giant board. Props, yo.
290👍 191👎
For years people have used the expression "Jesus H Christ" without knowing what the H stands for. The H stands for Hank.
"Jesus Hank Christ! Nick wont stop peeping."
3👍 1👎
Main character in the best selling fiction book of all time. Don't bother reading it though, he dies in the end.
I'm so bummed that Jesus Christ got killed off in the end of the Bible! But hey, they could totally make a killer zombie movie from his resurrection.
598👍 455👎
A mythological creature to whom is attributed power to redeem man from eternal damnation as a consequence of sin. Born of man's need to believe in something, Christ is a useful tool for many things: keeping the gullible in line, raising money, imposing morals on others, justifying war, bloodshed, and terrorism, explaining away tragedies like childhood cancer and natural disaster, silencing dissent, and imposing guilt, are among the most popular miracles performed by Jesus.
Christ retains a strong following thousands of years after his invention, despite the advance of science, education, and technology in the years since.
Jesus Christ, almighty son of God, has all power in heaven and earth, except the power to grow a money tree.
171👍 103👎