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How a Republican describes themselves to a liberal friend.
"I'm a Registered Independent" she quickly offered, a moment after supporting the ripping of babies from their mother's arms, beating and tear-gassing Black Lives Matter protesters, and repeating that the pandemic ravaging America was 'fake news'.
the very first time you jerk off after breaking up with your girlfriend
i havent came like that since my declaration of independence.
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A town in Trempealeau county Wisconsin that is now the worlds leading producer of Pig Milk. Also known for its many other successful businesses such as Anderson Fabrications. Independence also is the home of several you-tubers that had their videos become viral such as "Spiderman Beat Down" By Bolandm56, as well as a parody to Macklemores Thrift Shop known as "PIG MILK" which was a promotional video for drinking Pig Milk.
Independence, Wisconsin got famous around the world in 2013 when a redneck whom is known as Matthew or "Mattress" (He got the nickname Mattress from a foreign exchange student who was complaining about his boots smelling like shit and also because of his many times mattress surfing around Independence) revieved the world record for biggest bonfire. The fire consisted of an old oversized chicken coop and 50 used tractor tires. You were able to see the fire from satellite and will probably be visible on google earth in the future. This fire caused major pollution around Independence and the effects can be seen in Independence's public school, where a kid that lives near the bonfire site is constantly seen banging his head into computer screens, keying teachers cars, and spray-painting other students rims pink.
Person1 "hey want to go up to Independence, WI? I heard they have some awesome bonfires and I wanted to try some Piggy Milk for the first time"
Person2 "Nah, I heard they only feed the pigs in Independence dead chickens, and didnt you hear about the hillbilly that spraypaints peoples rims pink? I heard he does that because he is supporting pig milk research."
Person1 "But we would have a chance to meet the youtube celebrities that live there, and duh he is a hillbilly why else would he milk pigs"
Person2 "You mean the videos with the; Redneck dancing with pigs, the Ginger kicking a blowup spiderman, and that kid that squeaks every time he talks when he is playing a terrible guitar cover to Enter Sandman? Its a shame that those people got any views at all, Im definitely not going!
Person 1 "but I heard they give away these awesome mini tacos and pig milk samples if you tour the pig milking parlor.
Person 2 "you're weird dude...im leaving.
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the mulletopolis of Mid-America
home of "give em hell" Harry Truman, who nuked a fuckload of Japanese before becoming a lame duck president a year later
the meth capital of the world in the 1990s
the birthplace of Ginger Rodgers and Jean Harlow
the burial place of jazz saxophonist Charlie Parker
established in 1827 nearly 23 years before neighboring Kansas City, Missouri
the third largest city in Missouri (bigger than Springfield)
starting point of the Oregon, Santa Fe and California trails in the early 1800s: the Queen City of the Trails
home of the Independence Events Center where the Missouri Mavericks play hockey
home of Arrowhead and Kaufmann Stadiums; home of the Kansas City Cheifs and Royals
a city of approximately 125,000 people situated in suburban Kansas City, Missouri, to the immediate east
the most sacred site on earth and worldwide HQ to members of the Reorganized Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints despite the fact that local Baptists and Methodists kicked the Smith brothers out of Jackson County after creating a lynch mob
the RLDS temple with the spiral dome is where Christ is supposed to appear on Judgement Day
the town where the RLDS church keeps the geneology of every American going back to the Census of 1790'
the place of two Civil War battlefields
home of the most violent police force in the United States, which operates as an arm of the RLDS church and commits savage acts of police brutality on members of the media even as the cameras are rolling
the true gateway to the wild wild American West (not St. Louis)
Independence, MO is a city with a storied past and potential for a great future again, but something has to be done to discourage low-brow idiots from settling here
There's a shit load of hillbillies, wiggers and trash of all ethnicities in Independence, MO. Why can't they move to Kansas City, Kansas, where they belong?
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school in delaware where all the seventh copy off the 8th graders where they give behaviorals out in the beginging of school for blowing your nose out of turn or throwing foam frisbee(aka and bareh) at somebody
go there and you shall see and witness these stange events
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A deviant sexual behavior whereby, while receiving fellatio and simultaneous massage of the scrotum, said recipient expels extended, audible flatulence. When performed successfully, the flatus resembles a harmonious musical drone, producing a scenario in which the fellating partner is reminded of playing the Scottish bagpipes, a symbol of independence.
Willing Fellator: So, do you want me to go down on you?
Flatulent Male: Of course!... as long as you don't mind a little Scottish independence.
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Fucking bullshit that people try to pass off as genuine scientific research
Look, Bill Gates, the Earth is proven to be flat! All with the power of Independent Research!
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