Townies, now that is some blingin' sh*t, yo! Seriously, these bastards shouldn't deserve to live (if you can call the pathetic thing they have a 'life'). Every night I lay awake in bed with a bible in my hand, thinking: 'On what day did the lord create townies, and couldn't he have rested on that day too?' Look in a bus shelter, you may find one, wearing shirts that say 'von dutch' or FCUK or some american city that nobody wants to visit. You can't possibly be a cool townie if you are capable of understanding and using the english language. They are racist pigs, who hate africans, but imitate them in music. Comparing anyone to townies is offensive, so i'm very sorry to all mentioned so far. Oh, and i'm not finished yet.
They listen to generic 'gangsta' 'phat' 'beatz', and are so underground and rebellious that the music they like is one of the most commercial and mass produced/marketed musical styles ever. They also like bob marley despite never listening to him or acknowledging his pacifist message, but whenever they get a chance, they cover all school design projects with ganja leaves, making it cool to be slowly killing themselves. They also manage to make anything into a sex reference.
EG: *actual conversation*
townie 1: Yo man, she iz wel fit, innit!
(points at ugly female townie with face offensive to anyone with eyes)
townie 2: Yo meen da 1 wit' da Burba...bur.. burbar..red cap?
Townie 1: I'd like to wear 'er capyo no wat i meen?
Townie 1: (looks confused,thinks for a minute) ... Yeah man, innit!
What an intellect, eh? Seriously, townies are hard people, if they outnumber you 50 to 1, they will consider attacking you until they realise that they'd rather be doing it with their sister/brother. They also prove how 'ard they are by shouting 'ya mum' at you. they kiss their 'bitches' in public, and have no sense of people looking and thinking: 'what a load of *****s', because theyre cool to their 'cru', so obviously their lives will amount to more than a part time job at mcdonalds drive thru. No, wait...
townie: Wot da f*** lookin at?
Normal person: You
Townie:so u fink ur solid, huh?
normal person: well i'm not a liquid, if that's what you mean...
townie: (to cru) Right, get 'im, innit!
(townies get beaten up)
Townie: Right, i'll get ma (insert family member here) on u
Then, the family member comes, the same thing happens andthey get more and older family members on you. This process is called the aging cycle, and it reapeats itself till they get to the age when most townies die (26)
55๐ 16๐
Someone who is going no where in life. Someone who grows up in a certain town (Foxboro for Example) and does not leave this town after highschool. A towny does not go to a real college and gets trashed every night. This is the type of person that most likly in the future will beat their townie wives, and have kids that also become townies
Scene: ten year High school reunion
"Wow Tyler, whatchya doin now?"asks Jon
"Well i still live at home" Tyler Replys
"Did you go to school?"
"No."
"Got a wife or kids?" Jon Asks
"Yah, im married to Katie"
"Oh god you are one big Townie family huh?"
26๐ 6๐
A townie is an English word for a person who:
1. Uses the phrase "Ya Mum" as an insult
2. Thinks that it is cool/hard to use various words beginning with F and S
3. Listens to "Phat Beats" - Blazin Squad, So Solid Crew, Jay-Z (or whatever) etc.
4. Drives a Car such as a Vauxhall Nova or Ford Escort or similar which has A body kit, lowerred suspension, large exhaust, and a huge Subwoofer in the boot to make sure that everyone can hear their "Phat Beats"
5. Has a stupid nickname such as "Jubba" or "Staples"
6. Steals mobile phones
7. Wears "Bling Threads"
8. Walks in a stupid, exaggerated way
9. Has a fundamental disability to pronounce the letter "H"
10. Smokes all the time whilst doing the above
11. Is challenged by a lack of immagination
12. Has a Helly Hansen "Puffer Jacket"
13. Has gelled blonde (dyed) hair
559๐ 219๐
All the morons on here like Psycho Bitch don't seem to realise that townies victimise those who don't share their Neanderthal way of life.They always bully metallers because of their musical taste and dress sense. For that person who said that moshers and skaters think they are better:Get your head out of your arse. They don't think they're better, they have just had enough of townie fuckwits picking on them, and so they should be. I can't stand all those stupid words like 'Blud', 'Innit' and 'Blingin'. Talking like some kind of rainforest ape. The girls dress like prostitutes and they act like them, and the males like their customers. They drive shit cars, drink horrible shit cider, flash their dicks at 70 year old women in the hope of pulling, and model themselves on gangsters and pimps (Who are low-life scum so its no surprise). I fucking hate townies and i pray to the gods that they have all been wiped out within the next few years
Yeh Blud, Innit Blud, I bang my 12 year old sister Blud, let me bum a tab off u (fucking wank stain).
111๐ 38๐
adjective: retards who cant afford good clothes so they buy cheap plastic clothes and jewellery. Often seen riding small bikes because they cant afford anything better. Think they are superior because of their lack of intelligence or balls.
Townies can be recognised by their lack of intelligence, monkey like walk, godawful baseball caps and having their tracksuit trousers tucked into their socks like some musketeer
Subtype Micro pikey Midgets who start on people but get beaten up so they threaten to get their monkey cousin on them.
Alex Penrice: A retarded townie with a brain the size of his nonexistent balls. Pre evolution example of the orangutang
Entire Penrice vocab
(only said when asked questions or insulted) Errrmmmm
Batty
Geek
If approached by one dont worry its completely harmless
109๐ 39๐
A curiosity particular to the British Isles, although derived chiefly from the gangsta rap culture of the inner cities of America. Townies are often seen in, as the name suggests, the town centre of any settlement, walking with a distinct bobbing movement akin to that of someone wearing a very heavy backpack. They have a tendency to clothe themselves in unnecessarily large olive-green parkas, tracksuits and plastic baseball caps. This is not dissimilar to a peacock's plumage, with the notable distinction that the peacock's tail feathers are a thing of beauty and make the male bird more attractive to the opposite sex.
On the subject of the opposite sex, it is often possible to observe the phenomenon of the "girl towny". This female variety is not dissimilar to the male variety, except that even more white clothing is worn, in stark contrast to the often orange war-paint worn caked over the faces of female townies. This serves to obliterate the feaures of the "girl townies" and cleverly hide the fact that the male and female of the species are almost indistinguishable without aids to appearance.
Interpersonal relationships among their own groups are often primitive, centred around cheap sexual conquests and who is going to "batter" who. The two are often linked.
The activities displayed by townies often serve to demonstrate a deep-seated aggression, often causing behaviour associated with extreme aggressiveness and violence. This includes a tendency to veer towards a non-towny in the street and "start on" them, at the same time accusing the aforementioned non-towny of doing the same to them. This is often accompanied by swearing, usually "Come on then, you f**king c**t!" or similar aggressive twaddle.
Townies generally have no knowledge of how their sub-culture started, as despite their apparent embracing of black culture, they are usually more likely to take part in a racist assault than normal people like you or I. In fact, any group assault is likely to have townies at the root of the problem.
I hope you have enjoyed reading my definition. If any more evidence/information is required, feel free to watch Crimewatch UK and look at the CCTV footage of street violence. I think you'll be pleasantly surprised. Seriously, do it.
Norm#1: "What happened to your face?"
Norm#2: "Townies."
Norm#1: "Oh. Right. Tasteful ring."
75๐ 25๐
These are the 21 year old people you see on a night, hanging around on street corners or near benches with their 13 year old girlfriend.
Basically, they are monkeys with cider, if your ever in a fight with a group of these people, go for the alpha male.
He'll be the one with the biggest bottle of cider,if tyou take him down then you have won the fight, the rest of them will run in fear.
look on your local street corner, or your nearest park bench and you will find a few.
87๐ 31๐