Academic Prostitute

A person who does academic work (i.e. writing papers, completing homework, etc.) for others, for money in return.

Person 1: Wanna hang out tonight?
Person 2: Can't. I have to write that entire English paper tonight.
Person 1: Why not just hire Ben, that academic prostitute, to do it for you?

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academic wankery

Language that academics use to bamboozle and confuse poor, unsuspecting students. The language encorpourates long and technical words designed to display intelligence and knowledge of literary terms but all it really shows is that the author is an academic WANKER! Or A.D for short.

A.D- A knowledge of contextual information broadens ones analytical and probing skills that adds dimension to the concept of existential construct developed after World War One.
Student- I don't get it!
A.D- That's because it really doesn't mean anything and I could probably sum up my point in one sentence because it is so shallow and brief but I would rather confuse you with my extensive knowledge of fuck all!
Student- Aha! Academic Wankery!

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it's all academic

all but over; the outcome is a given or certainty; a done deal

After Tyson's uppercut to his adversary, it was all academic!

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Academic Decathlon

(AD for short) a club in which you study your ass of to prove who knows the most useless information than who and also to determine who has the most prowess.

Who has the most prowess in your AD team.

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Academic Cocoon

1.)When an undergraduate university student who is living on campus feels that he/she knows nothing from the outside.Specifically World events.

2.)When any person studying or working in a university that feels that they are living in a world which is protected by the forces of academia. In financial and personal terms.

1.)What? Obama is elected? I have no idea because i live in an academic cocoon.

2.)Money is for real people not for people who live inside an academic cocoon.

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Academic Physique

A state of physical disarray and borderline obesity suffered during the university exam period where time for exercise is fundamentally limited by the need to cram unbelievable amounts of shite into your brain in order not to fail the year. Can often be traumatic, and difficult to counteract except through the medium of comfort eating, leading to a vicious circle of calorie consumption.

*A and B meet outside library for a cigarette*

A: "You're looking mighty plump today"
B: "*Sigh* Academic Physique has finally set in..."
A: "Aye."
B: "Aye."

*A and B finish smoking and return to their studies*

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academically challenged

The 'nice' word for stupid. often told to people who are in fact complete idiots in order to avoid offending them. sometimes has the exact opposite effect, as people generally do not like it when people use euphemisms to avoid offense.

i told that idiot from work he was academically challenged. it had the opposite effect of what i had intended, and it just pissed him off.

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