ewan simpson

Ewan Simpson is a fat speccy lad who gets hard in shopping centres because all of the clothes (He has a fetish for clothes) he eats dairy only even though he's lack toes and toller ant. He masturbates to little children singing on Britain's got talent and is best friends with all the special kids. You will normally find him in a hole or a basement of some mad scientist. He is also a wet carrot munching popcorn fork . His family swim and get kicked out of the special Olympics becayse they are too speedy for downies. He watched love island for a quickie with his dog. He is overall a bit weird.

Person 1: he's so weird

Person 2: oh yeah, that's Ewan Simpson

5👍 2👎

Ewan Hamilton

Ewan Hamilton, definitely a ginger. All Ewan’s are ginger, it’s written in stone. After the tenth commandment it’s written there, also happy birthday!

Random guy 1: He’s ginger!

Random guy 2: must be a Ewan Hamilton

Random guy 1 nods in agreement

Ewan MacTavish

Ditches the boys to face time a girl 100% simp

Don't do a Ewan MacTavish

Ewan Briggs

A Jewish midget who is socially awkward and is below 6 foot

Oh look it’s the green day lover Ewan Briggs

Ewan McFucker

Ewan McGreggor's character name from 'Angels and Demons' as opposed to the term Camerlengo, which although is Italian for 'Chamberlain', also happens to sound like a euphamism for someone's cock.

The character of Camerlengo Ewan McFucker will be played by none other than gay-icon Welsh actor, (trying to be Scottish) Ewan McGreggor, or as he's known to the whole universe, Obi-Wan Kenobi.

7👍 18👎

Ewan Scobie

he is an idiot who made us go in from PE early because he wouldn’t go in goal and he says he has a six pack but he obviously doesn’t.Also in English he literally couldn’t open a window because he’s that weak and he said “I didn’t want to break the window” Ewan just shut up

he’s so annoying - girl 1
well obviously he’s Ewan Scobie - girl 2

1👍 1👎

ewan mcgregor

A euphamism for the kind of actor who can only play themselves, and who is total shite when they try to actually play a character.

Based on the undoubted ability of Ewan to play a Scottish smackhead and nothing else.

"Yessh, I'm Sean Connery, er I mean Captain Marko Ramiush, Rushian Shubmarine Commanderr!"

Me: "Fuck me, Connery is a total Ewan McGregor!"
Christian Slater: "Yeah, so am I..."

19👍 119👎