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The towel that is kept handy by your bed side that is laid on top of the bed to prevent semen, lube, female ejaculate, Santorum or period blood from getting on the sheets.
Man, good thing we had that Spontaneous Jack Towel handy. That was a messy round of love making. The mood was not killed becaues it was handy by our bed side and now I can go to sleep knowing that I am not going to roll over into mixture of my semen, your ejaculate, and lube.
Spontaneous Self-Combustion is a more formal way of describing the act of spontaneously self-combusting. A more graphic description of Spontaneous Self-Combustion is where a flame inside the body bursts into a flaming outbreak, consuming the body and possibly the surrounding area.
The concept of Spontaneous Self-Combustion first appeared in writing in a Charles Dickens novel. Could the idea be linked with vampirism (burning in light), love (an internal flame of love) or smoking (accidentally inhaling/swallowing lighters, and/or fuel - don't try that at home, or anywhere for that matter)?
The practicality of Spontaneous Self-Combustion is questionable; can a human (mostly made of water) really spontaneously self-combust? Not that I am trying to taint the fun, or anything.
Spontaneous Self-Combustion is a fairly surreal concept to most, so fire-proof underclothing has not yet become necessary. Not yet.
As the person innocently wandered down the street, an internal flame grows into a rage and eats at the mortal remains. It was most unjustified!
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When a person, or Republican, randomly bursts into fire.
"Spontaneous Human Combustion can strike anyone, anytime, any--sic"
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The act of going somewhere without planning it.
Did you hear about John and Amanda? Their on there spontaneous weekend excursion! I think they went to California.
Similar to Morning Wood, spontaneous tree growth is a situation in which one gets a massive and long-lasting boner during daytime hours, usually at an inconvenient time such as during school or work.
David was totally about to get laid when he suddenly had a spontaneous tree growth, scaring off his prey.
The process of accidentally leaking splooge from one’s anus after receiving gay anal intercourse, particularly after a larger encounter.
After a long night of fornicating with the boys, I fell asleep before using the bathroom and had a spontaneous gay abortion in my sleep and woke up to a nasty surprise
Gonorrhea II is another more lesser-known form of the infamous STD which has symptoms that manifest themselves in the following ways...
1. You throw up constantly and for no reason, as in even on an empty stomach.
2. You pass out every thirty minutes, and will most likely drown in incorrectly thrown-out shit (throw-up) unless some stupid-ass turns you on your stomach or is somehow able to waken you immediatly.
3. After at least a year of having the disease (if you're unlucky enough to live that long through all the constant upheavals) you begin to have terrible heaves when throwing up, because your body will be improperly trying to execute symptom #4.
4. But it will eventually execute it correctly, and you will begin to shit out all of your vital organs, starting with your spleen, and working its way up to your esophagus, and eventually to your windpipe. But you won't make it that long, as you will die seconds after shitting out your heart or lungs. Though it seems to be physically inopinable and totally medically untrue, it can and will happen to nearly a hundred Americans each month. Why only Americans? Because they're all wusses and sellouts and deserve such a gruesome form of dying.
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