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An ingenious scam developed by book salesmen in 0BC
They wrote a book called 'The Bible' which was a #1 Best Seller across the middle east and then spread across the planet.
'The Bible' tells the story of Jesus and all his pals.
These salesmen, and Jesus, slowly gathered a large number of followers and plotted to take over the universe.
1.
Friend: I just finished reading 'The Bible', it's awesome
You: Yeah, I hope there's a sequel
2.
Friend: Man, I hate those 'Door-to-Door Biblemen'
You: Give them a break, Jesus told them to do it.
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1. Something that causes alcoholics to be become born again christians, then start drinking again.
2. Something Bush refers to but he cant read.
3. Is full of fictional stories, as Adam and Eve and a guy who lived inside a whale (how can you take this book seriously?)
4. Something people worship because they ignore science and listen to what mommy and daddy said because they're always right.
5. Purely fictional
6. Is disproven by evolution/big bang/laws of thermodynamics
christian: Im Sorry sir, but the bible says to lynch niggers.
african american: but the bible has no proof or says why you lynch black people.
christian: but your a nigger
dundundun
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Christian religious text used to gain salvation through Christ and follow His word. Meant to create peace and spread kindness to all who read it and preach its words
“Jesus loves you, it says so in the Bible”
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An egotistical autobiography that could be fiction.
Church: "Did you read The Bible"
Priest: "yes"
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Of course I'm gonna reread the Bible! That book is one of the best out there.
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1. The world's best selling book. This book is a fictional story with various authors. It's protagonist is named 'God'.
2. A fictional book used as 'proof' in arguments.
3. A book prejudice against Homosexual people.
4. A recipe for war and manual for acceptable murder.
5. The biggest lie in human history.
Theist: The bible has all the answers.
Atheist: oh, yeah? Who created 'God'?
Theist: No one did. He always existed.
Atheist: Yeah? Now you call yourself smart, right?
Theist: yeah.
Atheist: Okay, you believe that there's an imaginary man living in the sky. That the man can see everything that you're doing every second of your life.
Theist: ...
Atheist: This 'God' loves everyone but is as forgiving as he is cruel. He forgives rapists and murderers but will never forgive homosexuals. This is pure s***.
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Bible - a collection of books by many authors, written over many centuries. Describes the spiritual experiences of people who came from many different backgrounds and religious traditions. Often mocked by people who have never read it. Often treasured by people who have read it.
The Bible is not one book; it is a collection of many books written by many authors over many centuries.
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