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Gateway Messenger Theory

Very similar to "gateway drug theory" which is the theory that the use of less harmful drugs may lead to a future risk of using more dangerous hard drugs except the addict moves from more common chat systems like whatsApp, Skype etc back to more older and dangerous ones like BBM Chat.

Guy1: Omg omg omg! BBM is for Android now!
Guy2: So?
Guy1: I need to get it a hit of that BBM again!
Guy2: Ok then..... that;s Gateway Messenger Theory you suffer from.

by neoraj3.0 October 22, 2013


Interquartile drip theory

The measure between “fire” and “Ice” within the first and third quarter.

Wow did you see Davids fit? My mans used interquartile drip theory to calculate that shit for sure!

by Lettuc3 January 13, 2021


The Henry Resool Theory

The Henry Resool Index is a measure of how susceptible individuals are to believing their own false reality or truth to the point of delusion. A death of a relative could lead to a situation where an individual expresses these mannerisms - they may begin to replace the loss of their loved one by undergoing drastic changes in behaviour seen in conditions like BPD, for example consuming large amounts of alcohol or suddenly becoming sexually active to a destructive point in an effort to numb the pain of loss experienced. Their internal thought processes would be generally fueled by denial of the situation at hand as the sudden shock could be too much to bare on the mind, individuals most susceptible to the henry resool effect range from aged 13+.

The henry resool theory explains why my father has tricked himself into believing he makes rational life decisions whereas in reality his life is chaos.

by Psycho analysis February 11, 2021


Wall Post Theory

The Wall Post Theory states that the probability of someone hooking up with a particular individual is directly correlated to the number of Facebook wall posts made by that individual.

The Text Message and Poke Corollaries state the same for text messages and Facebook pokes. This correlation is even stronger but not as useful due to the lack of publicly available information.

I saw her facebook - he was all over her wall and
I said, "Yo, who was that?" "Oh, he's just a friend"
Don't gimme that, don't ever gimme that
Jus' bust this

You, you got what I need but you say he's just a friend
And you say he's just a friend, oh baby
You, you got what I need but you say he's just a friend
But you say he's just a friend, oh baby
You, you got what I need but you say he's just a friend
But you say he's just a friend

~ Biz Markie if he knew the Wall Post Theory

by wallposttheory July 24, 2010


Anti-Vote Theory

An alternative form of voting in which instead of showing your support for something, you instead vote against something you dislike. Traditionally to balance the system, you also add a clause where you may anti-vote as many times as you wish in order to get an accurate representation of how much people hate things. This form of voting is beneficial as it plays in to the much more natural human instinct of hating things instead of finding ways to like them.

1: hey who are you gonna vote for in the next election
2: I hate all of them, I wish I could just anti-vote the ones I hate the most
1: You’re talking about the Anti-Vote Theory dude
2: That’s sick

by TheColdHardFacts September 15, 2019


Ryan Pethick Theory

The Ryan Pethick Theory is an answer to the paradox of quantum superposition better known as "Schrödinger's cat". This theory states the second that the cat (or any other thing) becomes non-observable, it is dead. This theory is based on the not so logical logic that it is much easier to just assume that it's instantaneously dead. You don't have to worry about him, care about him, remember to send a text on his birthday. Basically everything is easier with the assumption that they are dead.

Friend of Ryan #1: "Ryan isn't dead guys he just goes to a different school"
Other Friends of Ryan: "Shut the fuck up... Ryan Pethick Theory."

by Mustela November 27, 2022


super-meta theory

The paradigm that light remains a constant when it bends.

The idea that gravity can change the shape of black holes but not the shape of photons.

Super-meta theory argues that gravity cannot bend light (as a constant) because it is being-bent by time in the future.

Light at the speed of infinity^infinity then travels up the metrology-plane (panformalist cylinder) attracting gravity which proceeds to bend black holes.

by flightfacilities December 8, 2020