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Hair (usually about shoulder-length) that is a combination of straight and wavy, but doesn't look that nice because you didn't bother to do anything to it. Looks similar to the hair jesus is portrayed to have when he's pictured as a white guy.
I was running late this morning so don't make fun of me, I'm just gonna sport the jesus hair
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When someone covers their finger in superglue, and then covers it in cocaine, and fingers someone. The fingeree instantly hits the G-spot.
Midway through intercourse:
Man: One second, babe!
Random girl:Okay...
Man: SHU-LAAH!
Girl: *Instant orgasm*
Other guy: Woah! Jesus Finger! Where's my camera?
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1. A Christian who's not dating because they are waiting for God to reveal their spouse. Made popular by the book "I Kissed Dating Goodbye" by Joshua Harris
2. A Christian who's not dating for one of the following reasons; intensely in love with God, fear relationships, fear intimacy, dating is just to much work, socially awkward, etc.
Don't bother asking her out, she's "dating Jesus".
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Someone who:
Has a bracelet,bumper sticker,t-shirt, etc with Christian phrases on it.
Is a born again Christian.
Goes to church.
Talks freely to many people about their beliefs.
Has the fire of Jesus in their heart.
That person is such a Jesus Freak!
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A group of super heroes with Jesus at the front. They are noted for defeating the Giant Satin Frog of Satan who had plagued the world for millions of years.
Matthew: OMG did you see jesus and pals on the news last night?
Josiah: Hellz yes I did they were freaking amazing
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Nickname for Donald Trump. Applicable since the launch of his campaign to run for the American presidency. The name references both his iconic, tanned skin-tone (orange) and the fact that his most adamant supporters blindly refuse to acknowledge or admit to even his most obvious shortcomings. Their stance toward Mr. Trump is almost one of unquestioned worship of a divine being (Jesus).
- Q) Did you hear the Donald Trump audiotape where he described grabbing women by the.. genitals?
- A) Yeah. It won't matter. Orange Jesus can do no wrong in the eyes of his supporters. They'll insist it's just a character attack by his opponents.
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1. Unequivocally bitchin'. Used where awesome, cool, sweet, dope, bangin' and monkey slappin' fail--a term so Jesus it fails to describe itself.
i.e. "That party was so Jesus!" "This guacamole is Jesuser than a motherfucker!" And the ever popular, "It ain't bitchin' if it ain't Jesus!"
2. Truth beyond truth. (Note that this usage of the term carries mystical powers, as it may be used to catalyze the transformation of previous nontruths into truths truer than other truths. It is not uncommon for a Jesus person to Jes-ify something previously nonJesus simply by using the word Jesus to describe it.)
Usage of the term 'Jesus' is highly useful to a Jesus peep. It is through this usage that a Jesus peep is able to simultaneously assert and assess the jesus-ness of him or herself and other, potentially Jesus people.
nonJesus peep: My chips and dip are so bitchin'!
Jesus peep: My chips and dip are Jesus.
Jesus peep: Hitler is Jesus.
nonJesus peep: How is Hitler Jesus? They are two completely different people. Plus, Hitler is directly responsible for the Holocaust and death of six million Jews, not to mention at least three million non Jews.
Jesus peep: Your face is Jesus.
nonJesus peep: How is my face Jesus? I was going to get a sub from blimpie today and I got bored and made eye contact with a baby and the baby started crying and I'm almost positive it was because of my face. Also, the young woman behind the counter didn't put extra jalapenos on my sub and I'm sure it's because of my face. Then I ate my sub and asked the young girl to prom and she said no because of my face and I'm sure it's because of my face!
Jesus peep: This mirror is Jesus.
nonJesus peep: Thank you so much! My face Jesuser than a motherfucker now!
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