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(verb): to become a nihilist/anarchist/political shit disturber.
a history professor: students, what's the fastest way to go hell and to be punished by the Unforgivables?
student: to reform The Church?
professor: Correct you are, but I would guess, that in Jesus's case, this would only apply to him as a historical character. The Romans saw Jesus as someone who was trying to reform The Church.
1. A man or boy who gets numbers from women or girls at a Church or Temple of God under the guise of being friendly and worshipping God, but really is only trying to sneak into their lives through text messages, thinking the Churchgirl is easy because they are supposed virgins.
2. A deceptive man who preys on church going woman or girls only to get into their pants because he was told they were easy with no regard of the woman's or girls relationships. God had other plans.
3. A complete ass wipe.
Sister 1 : Hey remember that guy who asked for your number, then texted you only to get at you?
Sister 2: Oh you mean the guy at church?
Sister1: Yeah Him! he just did the same thing to me! what a Church-Weirdo!
non-mean prank. these activities always:
1) leave the Recipient feeling loved, encouraged, &comforted.
2)anonymous surprises for the recipient. Give all the credit to Jesus Christ. This makes it even more fun, since you're secretly planning & carrying out a surprise for a person. Exceptions: a group completely pays off a person's debt etc
4) It is made to fit the recipient's specific needs. (example: Cindy was $20,498 in debt still from college loans. Cindy was "church-pranked" & received a check for exactly $20,498.
5)Choosing a recipient who has been discouraged, in a tough spot, had a close relative pass away recently, or in financial straights makes the "church-prank" all the better.
6)DON'T leave the recipients feeling worthless, scared, with any property damage, in a trash can, stuffed into a locker, with a swirly, or injured
7) if this act was done to ur pastor's daughter, would he be filled with righteous anger? no.
7) would you want this done to you? example, if u wouldn't want to find piles of poop on ur desk, it's not a church-prank to put poop on a persons desk. If u like to finding $20bills on ur desk, would someone else be encouraged if they found $20bills hidden on theirs?
8) church-pranks don't leave messes around & aren't illegal.
9)Does it bring someone closer to Jesus Christ? Does it leave the recipient thanking God? Does this act fit in with the loving, deeply caring, encouraging, comforting, good, creative character of God?
Frank couldn't afford to take his wife out to dinner. He got church-pranked when he opened an anonymous gift certificate for a dinner for 2.
Simon's old car broke down. He couldn't afford a car. Simon got church-pranked when his friends got together & bought Simon the new car of his dreams.
Sam went on a mission trip. He got church-pranked when he got home, only to find his lawn already mowed by an anonymous source.
Freddy the Freshmen went on his first mission trip. He was sad when he didn't see anyone get saved on the 1st day. Freddy cried himself to sleep. Freddy got church-pranked when he found a chocolate bar on top of his bag & encouraging Bible verses.
George, the receiver for the college football team, got into a car accident that left him paralyzed from the waist down. He had fallen asleep at the wheel. The pastor's son - who had been driving the other car- died. George's dream of playing in the NFL ended. Stuck in the hospital instead of on the football field & partying, George was sad. George would lose his football scholarship. He couldn't afford the hospital bills. But George got church-pranked when the pastor (whose son died in the car accident) was holding a check that not only covered his hospital bills but the next year's tuition &fees for college. He told George he was forgiven. Astounded, George accepted Jesus Christ. George graduated from college & became a doctor.
Where Charlie’s Angels come to think, pray, and ask for forgiveness from the Charlie god.
I’m gonna go to the Church of Charlie so that badass is forgiven
What you call your friend,associate,etc when they are dressed very out of date and style
Hannah you dress like such a church lady
The Church Of Elvis The King and The Second Sway
A facebook group; notable for it's borderline-psychotic Pastor, and for its well-documented animosity towards the Presleytarians.
Currently working on a project to reclaim the lost Elvis-ish relics of the Holy Throne and The Holy Beer Cooler...both of which were seen as The King was Kissing Vinyl in his Last Moments.
"Who the hell is that spamming all over Facebook?"
--------"It's the church of elvis nutters. again!"
Every person heard this once in your life. If you cant FIGURE OUT WHATS MISSING, TAKE YO ASS TO CHURCH.
1:I need to go back to the bar and post up.
2:For What?
1:I think better there.
2:What you need to do is take yo ass to church. The bar may be there still afterwards. Plus it quieter than the bar.
1:Bitch will you get off my case and let me drink for once!
2: your choice.