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n. muffin shaped penis, which at full erection is hard as wood or "lumber". (other definition) n. human feces that is a cause of eating a "Denny's lumber jack slam" with the combination of a muffin.
first example: girl say's to sexual partner "ow! i can't fit that lumber muffin."
2nd example: "dude... i ate at Denny's and had a muffin it took me 30min. to shit that lumber muffin."
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its a creature that is half muffin half dog most likley as a cartoon character, not real
it is the size of a pug, and to get around it hopps around and it eats coockies
muffin pup: W00F W00F W00F W00F W00F
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When your mom comes home when your cooking muffins for summer fun and you may be a jew but you can still have fun so you go ahead and throw yourself out there only to fuck a space time continuum and get 1900d freedom fucked off of rust bc your mom hates your Lil jew ass hole because you are fucking petunia slut who only worships the demons of celzar because you can only drink powerade because your mom is stuck in the great depression and can only afford a watered down Gatorade because the oppression of society is weighing her down and she can't even swim under the sea with a mermaid and a crab because her family hates her because who has hermit crabs you fucking racist piece of dick queso lookin ass I bet you kiss nobody with that mouth you imbread computer mouse.
Your such a jewberry muffin
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A fat 30 something woman with a flat face who lectures high value men for not being married to other 30 somethings with a notch count of 100+ men. Is a feminist, often found attending weddings of her mates who have cuckolded weak men. Gives her fat simp cousin hand jobs at the back of the Home and tells him he has a full head of hair. Arranges marriages and regularly cuckolds her husband gyrating her fat hole on the dance floor of the Home while he watches from the bar.
Got confronted by the Mouthy Muffin on Saturday night. Told me I need to be married
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To force your vagina on someone's face.
"dude, we were just hanging out and the next thing I know I got muffin smashed. "
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Michelle : Oh Mark I sure did miss your hard dick inside me Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!
Mark : Oh Michelle I sure did miss your soft pussy YEE! YEE! YEE! (splat) OOPS!
Michelle : OOPS! WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT SMELL?
Mark : Oh nothing just a little Crud Muffin come on let's cuddlefuck!
Michelle : LITTLE IT'S THE SIZE OF A SOFTBALL? You pooped a Crud Muffin on my leg while you was pounding my pussy! GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY BED!
Mark : Uh I believe this is our bed and I want to cuddlefuck!
Michelle : Uh we are divorced and this is my bed GET THE FUCK OUT!
Mark : (sniff) (sniff)
Michelle : And take your god damn Crud Muffin with you! (splat)
Steve : Hey Mark you look so sexy with that Crud Muffin on your face Mmmm!
Mark : Wow Steve thanks! (sniff) (sniff)
Michelle : MARK WHY THE HELL IS SOME GUY LICKING YOUR FACE AND RUBBING YOUR COCK!
Mark : I don't know but it feel's kinda nice! (sniff) (sniff)
Michelle : GROSS! Im calling the cops!
Steve : You know Mark in prison you can get fucked in the ass and blow Crud Muffins everywhere!
Mark : Wow that sounds kinda nice! (sniff) (sniff)
Michelle : Hello Police two gay guy's broke into my house and there are Crud Muffins everywhere!
Steve : Mmmm! Crud Muffins! (wink)
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A slang for ass-turtle or crump-stick
Shut up John your such a purple muffin!
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