dungeon wisdom test

When someone wants something of you, and you test them to see if they'd have done the same for you.

Michael asks Dwight if he can stay in his hotel room when there's no vacancy. Dwight tricks Michael by saying the room is actually in Michael's name, and then asks Michael if he could stay in the room. Michael declines. Dwight reveals that the reservations are in his name, not Michael's. Michael has failed the dungeon wisdom test, so Dwight doesn't let Michael stay in the room.

The FitnessGram Pacer Test

Torture...

“Yoooo, I went up to 50 In the FitnessGram Pacer Test!”
“Carrlooss!”

test my salad

1. testing the viability of individual leaves of salad greens or baby spinach when picking through the container. You know that the greens are almost spoiled because of the smell, but you can tell that most of the leaves are OK. So you pick through and try to remove just the slimy, decaying pieces.

2. bending over in front of a mirror and checking out your own business end

Thank you for coming over while I cook you dinner. Pardon me while I test my salad.

glucose tolerance test

A four-letter word: hell. Doctors usually order this if you're at risk for diabetes. You are forced to fast prior to the test which can last up to five hours and your blood is taken every half hour.

I can only work part-time tomorrow because I have a glucose tolerance test tomorrow. If the test comes back and says I have diabetes, then I'm probably screwed.

Egyptian electric testes

Being tased by a 50,000 volt taser directly on your taint and balls.

Yo did you try that new sex move?
You mean the Egyptian electric testes OF COURSE!
Yup how is it.
I can't have kids.

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Driver Test Stop

The opposite of a California Rolling Stop. Someone who does a Drivers Test Stop goes up to a stop sign, comes to a complete stop, waits for 3 seconds, and than slowly accelerates into the intersection. Likely to cause low speed collisions, especially in California where drivers are expected to drive through stop signs.

Most commonly done by recently licensed drivers, old people, and minivan drivers.

Note: after three seconds it is socially acceptable to honk.

It took me an extra 5 minutes to get to work today because the guy in front of me was taking Driver Test Stops. He almost caused me to rear end him.