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spiritual masterbation

1) People who think their needs spiritually and/or religiously are more important then others around them, especially those who might need their help.

2) People who are self-centered it when it comes to spirituality or religion.

Tova: I asked the advisors to helped me do shmirah, but they were to busy doing kiddush to be bothered.
Varda: I wish they would stop with their spiritual masterbation for a once to actually do their job!

by Brown Eyed Girl June 6, 2005

18๐Ÿ‘ 24๐Ÿ‘Ž


status masterbation

A facebook, twitter, or other social media status update that serves only for the psychosocial gratification of the poster, not unlike sexual masterbation.

-Did you see Lisa's most recent facebook status update about how happy she is with her life and how thankful she is for everyone?

-Yeah, I did, and I can't stop reading it. I have such a fetish for reading status masterbation.

by andmybow February 18, 2014

2๐Ÿ‘ 1๐Ÿ‘Ž


Brain-Masterbation

Telling yourself you're right while ignoring actual facts.

In his delusional state, Cambo prefered his Brain-Masterbation and was completely unaware of the actual fact that he was sitting in a burning house.

by Card_Sultan May 12, 2015

4๐Ÿ‘ 5๐Ÿ‘Ž


Naturistic Masterbating

Where a person who has ran out of ideas to save trees or a nature preserve and has to go to extmere mesasures. Naturistic Masterbation is where a strong point is being made and to stop the man and to give in to his demands. Even if it means getting into nature.

Oh my god! Will that guy stop Naturistic Masterbating. Just let the man be with his trees!

by Mark Jackson. January 17, 2009

5๐Ÿ‘ 7๐Ÿ‘Ž


Clown Masterbation

Clown masterbation occurs when you put your penis in a large rainbow wig. Then you rug vigerusly until you cry and bleed (at the same time).

So dude how did you get into the circus?
Oh I had to do some clown masterbation

by ianz. June 6, 2010

4๐Ÿ‘ 6๐Ÿ‘Ž


Hook Masterbation

To masterbate oneself with hooks.

Damn, I have no hands, so I have to yank off with hooks! I call it Hook Masterbation.

by jasonk123 January 16, 2006

46๐Ÿ‘ 163๐Ÿ‘Ž


alien masterbation

sticking a dry finger in an ear.

She alien masterbated her boyfriend.

by jake March 6, 2005

8๐Ÿ‘ 22๐Ÿ‘Ž