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life insurance

The investment you make betting that your worth more dead than alive. Upon death your investment usually results in your family getting rich.

John was a loser not worth a crap to his family, then he died and the life insurance made then filthy stinking rich.

by Dr. Uncle Fucker Crapper John M.D. July 23, 2003

26👍 32👎


Insurance agent

One of the shittiest people there are. Usually have a shitty name like Jeff and pretend to give you a "deal" in order to sign you up but one you get into an accident you'll soon realize you don't know even have insurance. Usually bundles all kinds of insurance together too so he makes the most money and you don't even know about it.

I'm so excited I just got new insurance at a low rate from my insurance agent!

Did someone named jeff sign you up?

Yeah he did!

LOL, you played yourself.

by Extremeist June 13, 2017

6👍 4👎


Food insurance

Food insurance is a second meal ordered at the same time as your original meal. It is used as insurance in case you are still hungry. Not to be confused with a side order.

Chris got the Mac and cheese platter as food insurance. He is never sure if the spaghetti pizza will be enough.

by abeanpie December 22, 2017


memory insurance

A method of writing something down before you forget, whether on a piece of paper or on your arm or hand. May also include calling your own phone and leaving yourself a voice message, or emailing yourself. Basically a self-reminder.

Roommate 1: Can you give me a ride to the airport on Friday? My flight leaves at 6.
Roommate 2: Yeah hold on a sec, I'm gonna write that on a sticky note, just for memory insurance.

by ambermonk April 22, 2011


Insurance Jale

When ADA is at a red light, puts his car in reverse and bumps the person stopped behind him and blames it on them, opens the door and rolls on the floor holding his neck and you can hear him yelling “ I should have had me neck brace on and I wouldn’t be in this pain” Timmy where are you, kill me now my nalgas are all Mojadas 😳

ADA get you neck brace ready, you have to drive soon clown it’s Insurance Jale time

by FactualTruth March 6, 2019


Life Insurance

The reason why people kill their spouses

Life Insurance

by Eddie the Head November 11, 2022


Car Insurance

When you have sex in a driverless car on the highway. Hope you enjoyed it, It'll probably be the end.

We really tested out our car insurance last night, didn't we, sis?

by Condomant May 25, 2023