one day

A euphemistic way of saying never.

My boyfriend keeps asking for anal sex. I tell him I'll let him put it in my butt one day, but we both know it's never gonna happen.

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those ones

A redundant way for uneducated people to say "those."

Your friend: "Do you like those ones?"
You: "Yeah, _those_ are nice."

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bend one in

(v) to shag a girl in a semi-non-romantic moment

"How did it go with the bird from the chip shop last night?"
"Great - she paid for the pizza, and back at her place I managed to bend one in."

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up-ons

Up on; completely on top of in a metaphorical sense

"Da ladies will be all up-ons!"

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the hot one

a teacher so hot that you dont even know her name you just know her by the hot one.

guy 1: dude have you seen ms lopez she looks hot today!!

guy 2: who?

guy 1: ms lopez, you know the hot one.

guy 2: oo yea she does look good.

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One Direction

A boy band in this year's (2010) X-Factor, put together by Simon Cowell. It consists of Liam Payne, Harry Styles, Zayn Malik, Louis Tomlinson, Niall Horan. Each of them have their own dedicated fan groups who often argue about which band member is the best. Hugely popular with teenage girls across Britain, they are like the second-coming of JLS but generally better looking and younger.

An infaturation with this band is termed 'One Direction Infection'.

Leila: Who are you voting for tthis Saturday on X-Factor?

Francesca: One Direction of course! ZOMG I love Liam Payne sooo much!

Leila: no, Harry Styles is definitely the best.

*random third girl*: no way, Zayn Malik is the one for me *swoons*.

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table for one

Masturbation.

Person 1: Hey man, are you going over to your girlfriends tonight for some action?
Person 2: Nah, I'm just gonna take a table for one.

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