Lord have Jesus

Lord have Jesus is an misspelling of some other word. Its also used in comedy.

Jon : Want to see my automatic fleshlight?

Dave : Lord have Jesus.

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have fun staying poor

Phrase used by Bitcoin community to warn against altcoins, a.k.a. 'shitcoins' as a poor investment.

Are you seriously buying XRP? Have fun staying poor!

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i will dl and have a look

The person issuing the statement intends to judge the proffered material by means of first DL and then look.
There is implied in the statement the possibility of reporting back following the look.

Huge mamaries? I will DL and have a look.

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having a tug of war with cyclops

masturbation, wanking, having one off the wrist

Tony was having a tug of war with cyclops.

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Dude you have no Quran

Said to a person, when they do not have something that is vital to a process they are about to complete. It may have been stolen (or otherwise made unavailable) from them shortly beforehand.
It was first used by Jacob Isom when he stole a Quran from a preacher who was going to burn it, in a viral video.

Teacher: And now, we will look at the results. I'll just get up that database.
Student: Dude you have no Quran. (After having uninstalled the database software.)

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I Have Bieber Fever

Bieber Fever is a disease caught mostly by TWEENAGE girls, caused by overdosage of Justin Bieber music, merchandise and videos. You know you "have Bieber Fever" when you have more then one Bieber poster, you have at least one album, know the words to "Baby" off by heart or went to see his movie "Never Say Never" in the theater.

Girl 1: Oh my god, isn't Justin Bieber so hot?!?!
Girl 2: Oh my god, I know!! I have Bieber Fever!!

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should have polished the wood

What you should have done...instead of getting her pregnant!

He: "Damn! I should have polished the wood instead of knocking you up!"

She: "You were. But you forgot I was there!"

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