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Random
person 1: "my clock looks a little boring"
person 2: "ill get you a clock thong!"
To put diamonds on a watch face
Got this new Omega, time to Flood the Clock
The most fucking wromg thing in the history of the universe.
Timmy: hey, class is almost over!
Sam: No, you fucking idiot, the classroom clock is 20 minutes behind.
Ever tried eating a clock? It's very time consuming.
I tried to make a belt out of watches, but it was a waist of time
Do hungry time-travellers ever go back four seconds
I was going to look for my missing watch, but I could never find the time.
6:30 is the best time on a clock, hands down.
I was going to grow some herbs but I couldn't find the thyme...
They're finally making a movie called clocks. It's about time.
What do you call a story that one clock tells to another? Second hand information.
We call our dog Rolex, since he’s a watchdog.
What happens when you annoy a clock? It gets ticked off.
What did the robber say to the clock? Hands up!
Why did the man sit on his clock? He wanted to be on time.
If I wanted to have the time of my life, I would work in a clock shop.
I can't believe they fired me from the clock factory after all the extra hours I put in...
Why didn’t the clock work? It needed a hand.
When a person, usually your spouse or in-law, tries to pin you down to a certain time even though they know certain aspects are out of your control and they are pretty aware you will be not arriving when they want you to.
After the question is posed in several ways, the offender usually succumbs and blurts out a time they know will make the spouse happy but is totally implausible, thus hanging themselves based on the time they were coerced into stating.
Wife: So what time will you be home tonight?
Husband: I am not sure because of this 5pm meeting today and the usual traffic.
Wife: Usually you are home at 5:45, so maybe you will be here like 5:50?
Husband: When I get home at 5:45 I do not have 5pm meetings on those days so it is hard to say
Wife: How long is your meeting?
Husband: I'm not running it so I am not sure
Wife: Traffic shouldn't be too bad since it's friday so you can probably get here by 6pm I would think, don't you?
Husband: yeah sure 6pm
The husband was effectively put in a clock-noose
suck dick for a living. 'bop' like the head motion of sucking dick, "on the clock" referring to working and getting paid for it.
Chick #1: "Lissa hooks up with everyone. All she freaking does is blow guys all day"
Chick #2: "Hell yea! She bop on the clock, ya feel me?"
Brain-rot slang for “what time is it?”
“Hey Emani, skibidi clock?”
Emani: “it’s 4:45!”