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Behind The Couch

When a bunch of cracka mates jerk off in one room behind different furniture so its less homosexual they both come watching the same porn and the fat cunt normally comes first

"Me and Roofa Jerked off behind the couch to Ray J and Kim K's Porno"

by Aidsandcancer August 15, 2018


Companion Couch

A super-comfy couch, with an in-built phone charger.

Is that a Companion Couch? That couch is completely rad!

by givesies February 22, 2018


couch fuckin

the act of fucking the cushions of a couch. A plastic bag is often used to catch the cum

Before I met you. All I was doing was couch fuckin

by Peter long lasting June 22, 2010


Couch Packages

Cocaine that is purchased and snorted while sitting on one’s couch, widely popular in 2020 during the coronavirus lockdowns.

Friend 1: Any plans tn?

Friend 2: Prob just gonna grab beers and do couch packages by my place

by Art Corr June 6, 2020


Couch-cutter

A person who suffers from paranoid delusions and hallucinations, who coincidentally cuts holes in furniture because they believe there are people hiding or living inside.

Be careful letting him stay overnight by himself...Poor fella'. He's a couch-cutter.

by ZelaromoraleZ July 14, 2020


Couch Mummy

Someone who is sick with the flu in Chicago and often sleeping on their back on the long couch usually with a backpacker liner with hood enclosed with their face showing or wrapped from shoulders to toe in fleece. The reaction might inspire a few creative nonfiction writers who got the idea from old photos going around. The blanket often used is a full size fleece blanket or something that is not bulky. This would be forced the one who is sick to stay in bed and keep them out of their room mates quarters. This is sometimes borrowed from first aid for when those had gone into shock and get the chills; or hypothermia. This is common in the Chicagoland area; where some would sleep in their friends Chevy Van if has a bed set up but make sure they're secured or a makeshift bed in the back of a older station wagon. Sometimes knocked out while the driver is going around looking for a fix not knowing the person who is under the weather needs an IV.

Way we saw the lady hosting a party in Justice there was some guests under the weather and chugging theraflu like it was Vodka in a mug then coughing up their lungs, one of the guests was Egyptian wrapped and sleeping on the couch. They stuffed the wrapped body in sleeping bag too and placed her on the couch. She was running a high fever and had doctor making a house call. Hence they coined this a Couch Mummy.

by illinoishorrorman January 26, 2019


couched cunt

A person who is a lazy cunt. This word is usually said by people of German origin.
Only true memes will say this, the type of person who can make anything into a hilarious or dark humored joke.

Cactus: you fucking faggout
Alana: stfu
Cactus: *shaking my head* *in loud voice*
You couched cunt.

by DeutschlandUnion October 24, 2018