playing the bases

"Playing the bases" is both a term for a relationship that has yet to be defined and a description of what goes on in it.

When two people are fooling around semi-frequently yet have not yet decided whether they want to be in a relationship.

"Hey, what is up with you and Jackie?"

"I do not know man... We are playing the bases."

1👍 1👎

92nd base

When you have sex in the back of a Duesenberg being driven by a unicorn named Karen at exactly 88 mph with a Vegas prostitute, a MILF, a woman with L-cup boobs, a breeze block, a half-melted ice cream sandwich, a Pikachu, a Sega SG-1000, Terminator, and a bottle of hot sauce while humming "I Just Called To Say I Love You" and juggling McNuggets while "Drops of Jupiter" is playing loudly in G-Major.

Only Chuck Norris has ever gotten to, or can get to, 92nd base.

1👍 1👎

Plant-Based

When someone eats like a vegan, but still accepts animals being exploited for products and clothing.

"Are you a vegan?" "Nah, I'm only on a plant-based diet."

1👍 1👎

based socialism

When the government does sh*t to help people and not just the rich

Crazy how we socialize military ammunition that costs us billions but ‘based socialism’ is radical cause we’d help the poor instead of endless war.

1👍 1👎

Base jumping

An activity for the kind of moron who doesnt have the self control to wait for the next plane or helicopter to parachute.

Guy getting out of jail- They got me for trespassing at the TV station. They had to come get me down off the guy wires, I was lucky, I could be dead right now.

Guy who knows him- Why dont you just go skydiving if you want to parachute that bad, that way theres no guy wires to get caught on?

Guy getting out of jail- I have to jump off everything I see, theres not really a good reason why.

Guy who knows him- I didnt think there would be, it's getting expensive to bail you out of jail for base jumping.

1👍 1👎

103455th base

Being called Matteo

I got to 103455th base when i was born

1👍 1👎

21st base

Giving yourself a blow job. Then your penis blows up. And then the world blows up. And a penis takes its place.

Friend Isn't that just 20th base but extreme?

Me:Fuck yeah it is. 21st base is better though.

1👍 1👎