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A situation in which people put on blindfolds and masturbate people they cannot see.
The teacher lead a blindfold masturbation session with his students.
The act of laughing at or enjoying your own jokes to such an extent to which it may be seen to cause you arousal.
Steve: Don't you find it weird how Dave always laughs at his own jokes? They aren't even funny...
James: Yeah, he's really into joke masturbation.
Ethical masturbation does NOT refer to a literal act of masturbation performed ethically, rather, it refers to an act of self loathing and self deprecation done with the goal to ease one's mind, it is often done as follows (conversation example):
Ethical masturbator: oh no, big bad me did a big bad thing
a normal person: maybe do something about it, then?
Ethical masturbator: no, I will just sit here and talk myself down so that I feel like I have been true to myself and so I won't feel guilty about something-bad-that-I-did/something-bad-that-just-happened-on-it's-own even despite the fact that I did nothing to fix it.
another form of Ethical masturbation is doing the same exact thing but rather than just indulging in self-loathing, one might also start asking supernatural entities (gods, spirits, ETC) for forgiveness
just saying that you are bad won't fix things, it's not remorse - it's Ethical masturbation
A day where you HAVE to masturbate, the date is May 7th
"Holy fuckin shit bro National Masturbation day is today"
"cool"
Guys on gay hookup sites who get off on the idea of man-on-man sex, but are afraid actually do it. Instead, they message guys and masturbate while "planning" a hookup (where, when, who's going to do what to whom). Once they get off, they disappear (either go offline or delete profile) only to re-appear a few days or weeks later to do it again.
"Had another masturb-planner message me on Grindr today. Disappeared after I told him I was totally into all the things he liked, I have a 10" dick and was free now"
A moment of masturbation occurs when a person reaches orgasm after approximately 90 seconds of masturbation.
Person 1: damn bro you shat quite swiftly
Person2: that's because i didn't shit, i had a moment of masturbation
The event in which one individual endures a stomach ache while attempting to masturbate.
John: "I had a Poopy Fart Masturbation happen to me last night."
Andrew: "Tf?"