To crash your car into the bedroom/lounge room of an unsuspecting victims house, in turn waking them up.
Man 1: hey, why did you drive your car through David's house? You drive like an asian.
Man 2: Exactly, I gave David the Asian Alarm Clock.
The act of waking up a lazy roommate, hungover visitor or anyone who falls asleep on the couch in the middle of the day, by positioning yourself over their head, pulling your underwear to one side so that your scrotum hangs out loosely, carefully position your testicles about an inch over their eyelids and then yelling โScrotum Alarm Clockโ until they wake up and scream in horror and disgust at the site of your scrotum an inch from their face. It is recommended to move away quickly so the former sleeper does not injure the scrotum by swinging wildly when alarmed.
Joe passed out on the couch, so I gave him the olโ Scrotum Alarm Clock to wake him up!
When you wake up while receiving a blowjob.
Whats the best way to wake up?
dude you have to invest in a King's Alarm Clock.
When the male partner falls asleep with a boner, and then in order to wake him, the female partner then proceeds to bite the male's dick at about 2-3 inches from the head
A: Yo, I broke up with Sophie this morning...
B: Why? You were together for years!
A: The bitch had to give me a Romanian Alarm Clock!
B: Owwww...
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Person who wakes another person up with fellatio, cunnilingus, or anilingus.
If I have been good all week, every Friday morning, my girlfriend becomes my oral alarm clock.
An elaborate scheme to rid your bed of unwanted hoes. The idea is once you have realised that you have picked up a fugly bitch from a night you can not remember, you find your ass some jalapeno chillies and rub your finger(s) in them so as to obtain the spicey sweetness. From here, you proceed to ram-a-jam your spicey finger up the bitch's ass hole.
You will never see her again.
This technique may also be used if one wishes to have breakfast in bed or a full bed to themselves but be warned you will never see this girl again so make sure she's not special.
"Man I picked up THE ugliest bitch the other night"
"Fuck man, have a big one?"
"The biggest."
"How'd you act in the morning?"
"How do you think I acted? Dipped my fist in some jalapenos and ram-a-jammed my fist up that fuckers ass hole."
"Brutal Mexican Alarm Clock!!! Nice!!!"
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Suddenly waking up with the a strong desire for the toilet and the turtles head emerging uncontrolably - brought on as a result of consuming large quantities of the black stuff in the preceding hours
'I had a 'Guiness alarm clock' going off at seven thirty and now I'm off to the fucking launderette!!!'
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