cork taint

The musky taste of wine that went bad. As if someone rubbed the cork on their taint before corking the bottle.

This wine has some cork taint, it smells like my hookup last weekend.

Corked Bat

When someone tells you that a corked bat is a euphemism for an erect penis, you say, "no, it is not". After this you meant to tell your cousin something but I forgot what it was. Right. You know how baseball gets. No large bats/vampires.

Corked Bat doesn't mean anything like a penis

Cork it mate

When someone needs to shut the fuck up.

Jim: Greeting!
Bob: Cork it mate!
Jim: Godammit bob why do you need to be like this.
Bob: I just got a motherfucking vasectomy.

cork soaker

Comedic replacement word for "cocksucker". Even though SNL used the word in one of their sketches, they are not the originator. This word goes back to at least 1970, if not before, by the late, great, comic Redd Foxx on his old "dirty" record albums, way before the Sanford and Son TV show. I used to have the LP with this on it, don't remember the name of the album.

Redd Foxx audio comedy bit where he talks about people who soak corks for wine bottles whom he calls "cork soakers" as well as people who make frocks for expectant mothers, whom he calls "mother frockers". Foxx then talks about a convention which happens to host both groups, and states "I have never seen so many drunken mother frockers or cork soakers in my life".

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cork soaker

It is a variation of Cock Sucker. Based again on an SNL/Tina Fey skit, much like the Colonel Angus skit. Better said with an italian or spanish accent.

I'a like bein'a cork soaker. I'a been soakin da corks aaalllll my life. I soaka da bigga fat ones and'a da loooong skeeeeney ones!

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bottom cork

The last solid stool passed before a torrent of beer/curry fuelled shit pours out of the rectum.

"You were a while dear."
"Yes, I'm afraid I popped a bottom cork and the subsequent deluge was like alien blood, it damn near burned through the porcelin! It took an age to sort out."
"Oh err right, well shall we, erm continue..."
"Rather."
"Do you Charles Phillip Arthur George Winsor take Diana..."

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Cork Poop

When your first poop is a large, solid, and usually hard poop that you struggle to get out. Once you get it out and pop the cork, all the following poops are small, wet, and just flow out.

I thought I was done pooping and was going to make it to class on time. I was wrong. I had cork poop.

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