Random
Source Code

Mormon

The slang term for someone who is a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. It was originally a derogatory term. They believe that the Book of Mormon is another testament of Jesus Christ and in the Bible so long as it is translated correctly. They eat a healthy diet and and knew that certain substances are bad for you before modern science proved it. Those who follow their diet live longer too. They pay a "tithing", or one-tenth of their income to the church because everything belongs to God and so it's like keeping 90% of God's wealth. They do not have a paid clergy, everything is voluntary. They are not brainwashed, do not practice polygamy or any other weird thing, and do not smoke/drink. They were violently persecuted and forced to leave the U.S. because Governor Boggs of MO signed an extermination order. Yeah, all Mormons had to leave or be "exterminated" like cockroaches. Still, shortly after when the US government asked for soldiers during the Mexican-American War, they proudly sent 500 men to fight for the country that kicked them out. It was the women and children that crossed the plains and the rockies. Mormons are very misunderstood and are still persecuted.

It was still technically legal to kill a Mormon in some states until the later part of the 20th century. Christian fundalmentalist and Evangelist leaders just recently apologized for persecution of the Mormons.

by true little known facts May 13, 2005

258๐Ÿ‘ 300๐Ÿ‘Ž


mormon

A group of people who've been at least mildly brainwashed living under the thumb of a patriarchy that makes a fucking huge amount of money off of them and various other business and religious ventures. The mormon leadership is completely full of shit.

Mormons are just people...only they're completely evil.

by LDS needs LSD October 23, 2003

197๐Ÿ‘ 226๐Ÿ‘Ž


mormon

A home-grown American cult that grew into a world religion. Is loosely based on the more popular cult called "Christianity" (which is, of course, based in the cult of Judaism with a little Mithraism thrown in).

Like Catholicism, has its own secret rituals, shady hierarchy, and massive amounts of guilt and shame thrust upon its adherents.

"I'm a Mormon because I was brainwashed from birth to believe that some asshole racist prospector talked to god, gave no proof for his claims, and now am forced to feel guilty every time I think about poontang"

by Adam Harris Dawkins June 15, 2007

132๐Ÿ‘ 147๐Ÿ‘Ž


mormon

some freaky people who always knock on your door precisely during the middle of your dinner. Also believe that when they die they will become gods of their own planet, but only the men get a planet. Founded by Joseph Smith, who was previously convicted as being a con artist. They often piss you off.

The Mormon missionaries came to the door to preach to me, so I preached to them about the wonders of satanism and then told them if they did not leave my front porch they would be the main thing in my rituals. consequently, every Thursday evening I preform a blood sacrafice

by Sexy_sky_sky April 27, 2008

144๐Ÿ‘ 162๐Ÿ‘Ž


mormon

An evil cult, hell bent on taking over the world one mind at a time.

If those damn mormons knock on my door one more time, I'm gettin the gun.

by Calamity May 30, 2003

193๐Ÿ‘ 223๐Ÿ‘Ž


mormon

A person who's life is directed by the LDS cult. A person who will some day become a god of his own universe and will have multiple wives in heaven to populate his universe. A person that uses the Bible as a hook in an attempt to lend legitimacy to LDS doctrine. A master professional brain washer.

Look there's another one of those future gods knocking on my door.

by Moroni January 18, 2005

169๐Ÿ‘ 194๐Ÿ‘Ž


mormon

An evil and corrupt religion/cult. These people are only misunderstood in the way that instead of being just naive or ignorant. They are one of the most prejudiced groups of people I have ever seen.

I've lived in Mesa, Arizona for half my life, been to at least ten churches, and I have never been exposed to such ignorant or sexist people in my life. I only say these things because my dad's side of the family since the founding of the cult, have been a member (my great-great-grandfather helped founded Thatcher, Arizona).

All the seemingly superstitious elements that are played down and shrugged off like misunderstood traditions are real. All returned missionaries are given secret names that only they themselves can know until they 'reunite' with their family in heaven. Big Love the tv series touches on these subjects.

As evidence that they are unforgiving and vicious people, my father was excommunicated for marrying a divorced woman with a child. He was outcast, left to fend for himself without any familial support. His family didn't speak to him for 10 years, and his name was disparaged throughout the church. This was why he and my mother moved away to the east coast.

When they moved back to Arizona, they tried to integrate themselves back in the church but eventually realized this was not the religion for them.

Mormons might as well be Amish for the way they treat their women. Women are taught to sew, cook, clean, please her man, and basically become the servant to him, and create tons of 'god's children'. If you have less then four children, you are looked down upon. Any woman with leadership skills or a desire to be more than a housewife is told to be obedient and read the scripture.

Mormons are stupid, they are brainwashed sheep that have no self desire or freewill. They'll believe anything the church tells them to and condemn anyone who asks why they should believe what their told.

And polygamy isn't dead. The church has it stated in a document sealed within the central church in Utah that church leaders never gave up polygamy and only went along with it to save face. Leaders of the mormon religion still believe they should have multiple wives but if that got out it would reveal the religion as a bunch of liars.

Those manipulating, POS assholes also stole my idea of becoming a god when you die. Not in their definition, but close enough.

Ted: "Hey! I want to be a Mormon!"

Bob: "What, so you can have a fake name and believe in a guy who's church rituals come from the freemasons and found gold tablets with holy scripture carved into it, just lying somewhere in the forest?"

Ted: "...Well, maybe the secret name part..."

by Pointtech86 March 28, 2009

131๐Ÿ‘ 148๐Ÿ‘Ž