Chess Tactics

A move in chess where the opponent is so utterly flustered that he has the flickering thought to drop his king and resign. Leaving you to pump your fist and gloat with much enthusiasm.

Player 1: check, biatch! Check out them Chess Tactics.
Observer: Damn, those are some fine tactics.
Player 2: CRAP! You just made me lose the game.
Player 1: HAHAH, way to be a complete newbsauce. And you suck.

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chess progger

Usually a young individual from the ages of 12 to 24 that
uses a hacked chess UCI to cheat at online chess, thus giving
them a highly inflated ELO rating, while skewing legitimate
players ratings. Their internet ELO rating is usually well
over the master level of 2200, even though their real world,
Over The Board (OTB) rating is typically below 1400.
By cheating unknown individuals over the internet anonymously, proggers give themselves a false sense of accomplishment and gratification. They are selfish losers who only care about winning at any and all costs.

Damn it! That little fucking chess progger checkmated me again in under 30 moves and in only two minutes, twenty seconds (five minute clocks).

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urinal chess

When you strategically select a urinal with the intention that the next bathroom goer will either have to go right next to you or will take the walk of shame into the stall.

Walk of shame = check mate, gain a point

If the second person selects a urinal next to the original urinal man but cannot phase the original guy, then he doesn’t gain a point (assuming he creates a stream). If the second guy is phased and cannot manage a stream, he loses a point.

If you need to do the walk of shame, you lose a point.

“Urinall In” - In the event that there are more than 5 urinals and there’s is a one urinal gap between two guys, one can earn two points for bridging the buffer zone successfully. If you can’t manage a stream, you lose two points.

If you’re on the offensive, you have 7 seconds to create a stream or it’s considered a “failure to manage”, resulting a loss of a point.

“The Matthew Wilder” - If somehow when on the offensive the 2nd player successfully intimidates the first goer enough to break their stream mid-stream. The offensive player is awarded 5 points. The person whose stream breaks loses 5.

Rick: Yo man I totally just had the most bodacious check mate on this kid in a game of urinal chess.

Ralph: shit man, how many points you at now?

Rick: I’m at 11 on the week. I’m kind of a pro.

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Metaphorical Chess

-Usually between a man and a woman.
it is far more complicated then conventional chess, take all the board games u know and put them on a risk board of ur brain and hers behind a battleship divider

He sunk his pawn with her own queen. What a lucky pawn.

What a long game of metaphorical chess. It's lasted their entire marriage.

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Chess

A funny way of saying yes, can also be used to describe jizz.

Oh chess, i just chessed myself.

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Chess Pigeon

Chess Pigeon - A person suffering from the Dunning-Kruger effect.

Opening statement from britannica.com/science/Dunning-Kruger-effect
- "Dunning-Kruger effect, in psychology, a cognitive bias whereby people with limited knowledge or competence in a given intellectual or social domain greatly overestimate their own knowledge or competence in that domain relative to objective criteria or to the performance of their peers or of people in general."

IOWs, people who think they're smart, but aren't...but they don't know this due to the delusional belief they're smart. Those suffering from narcissistic traits also comes to mind.

The term 'Chess Pigeon' refers to the meme, and before it became one, apparently originated at...
rationalwiki.org/wiki/Pigeon_chess
...later becoming a meme (I like this version the best)...

"Arguing with idiots is like playing chess with a pigeon...no matter how good you are, the bird is going to shit on the board and strut around like it won anyway."

Thus such a person is a Chess Pigeon. Typically they strut around, brag and denigrate others, while actually showing how stupid they are for doing so, and often, this important information is difficult for them to comprehend, thus they continue to strut, brag and denigrate, and retain their false sense of superiority.

Typically, if you judge a person is a chess pigeon, it's best to cease arguing or conversing with them and let them remain in their delusional state where they prefer to exist.

I doubt anyone requires an example...but the site requires one.
"You're a chess pigeon."

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Calendar Chess

Planning an event with several other people around each of their schedules. This often turns into a gigantic clusterfuck, just like a game of chess for most people.

Person 1: well I can't go on the 19th through 23rd or the 25th, 26th or 29th
Person 2: I can't do it on the 27th
Person 3: I can only go on the 30th
Person 4: fuck off, I'm going alone
Person 5: gosh that's one fucked up game of calendar chess