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When you or someone need Jesus.
Looks like this is going to be a crazy day today I need a cup of Jesus
noun, at least I think so. could be a noun, could be an adjective, who gives a shit. parts of speech are lame anyway.
"Jesus Powers" is the description one applies to a particular person when a particular situation has occurred that defies logic and reason. When the impossible has not only been made possible, but accomplished as well then an individual may be referred to as having Jesus Powers.
(During a late night online first-person shooter match)
Guy 1:"Dude! I shot this asshole with, like, 30 fuckin' bullets! No fuckin' way he could have survived that shit. I was lighting his ass up!"
Guy 2: "Dude's got fuckin' Jesus powers man."
(While attending a magic show)
"How does Criss Angel do that shit? Must have Jesus powers."
Guy 1: "Fuckin' Jesus powers."
The reincarnation of Jesus with long hair who is hella smart he fr a full on genuis who doesn't let you flirt with him who would never date someone with low intelligence
Marcos (Jesus)
: No you have a boyfriend
A person obsessed with making organic fruit juice to sell at stands near children's schools. He spends hours obsessively manufacturing sweet fruit juices, in order to get the little kids hooked on it, so he can make money to support his religious causes.
How does Jimmy contribute so much to our church? Didn't you hear? He's a Jesus Juicer.
"Mommy, why does that guy always sell juice at that stand near out school?" "Darling, you stay away from him! He's a bad Jesus Juicer".
Fisting somebody with a Jesus Fist while screaming "Jesus take the wheel"
I love Jesus Fisting
When a christian boy has long flowing hair.
"Yo flow jesus i like your hair!"
"Ay thanks man"
When the sun is hidden behind a large cloud so that the light bounces all around the edges and creates an awesome shot of heavenly clouds. Unfortunately, cell phone cameras can never capture these epic views.
Bro: Whoa, look at that cloud, man!
Man: Dude that's epic.
Bro: Like, the light and stuff bouncing around.
Man: It's a Jesus Cloud!