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1) An analog used in comparison to the physical appearance of one’s wife after a period of domestic toil. Possibly made in an attempt at sympathy --by an idiot.
Mr. Johnson: "Hi hon, what’s for supper? Have you seen my USB beer opener? Whoa! Honey! You look like a bag of freshly smashed whale shit."
Mrs. Johnson: “Go fuck your hat Randy; I’m sleeping with your little brother!”
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The moment in which you now no longer resemble a human being but look more like a beached whale ready to take its eternal rest. protocal requires you to update you facebook status to read "beached whale status", but chances are your not gonna get it up there.
**You are now at the point of no return, you will not move for the rest of the night unless there is an emergency**
idiot: yo hand me my phone
You: dude i cant im beached whale status right now
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A phrase to describe a large amount of blood, paint, tomato juice, originally coined in the 60s to describe the tomatoe orgy popular in The Village in NY, now used by reporters inveigled by the Thai red shirts.
All these Thai red shirt rioters with their paint, and OMG blood, it's like a menstruating whale snatch, yeah!
That expression captures the overwhelming red so well, I hope it makes it to Urban dicK
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A wet willy but with semen. You cum on your finger and stick it in their ear.
That nasty asshole gave me a sperm whale.
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when you whipe your ass and strategicly place the toilet paper on the dry part of the toilet bowl so it surprises the next user and generly needs assistance to get flushed
my wife was pissed i left a beached whale for her
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An occasion where a muffin top is forced to make an important decision on whether it will possibly suck off a narwhal or if it may in fact get sauced around by a great grandma
They can be such sweaty beluga whales sometimes
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When a woman is wearing jeans that are so tight her fat is pouring out over them.
Eww! Look at that lady, she is like a whale in a mud puddle!
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