Shooting myself in the dick and expecting to survive

When someone suggests you stop or start doing something absolutely ridiculous that will affect something important to you, like your swag, your family or your life

Jack: Hey Joe, what are you giving up for lent?
Joe: Nothing, why?
Jack: Oh good. Can you give up chocolate with me?
Joe: No man, that's like shooting myself in the dick and expecting to survive

1👍 92👎

I'm either about to toot or shoot

This expression would be used by someone who has a degree of uncertainty about whether they have an urge to fart or whether he or she might actually shart or fully shit themselves.

I'm either about to toot or shoot right now, shall I risk it anyway?

I just finished my second bowl of nachos and I can't tell if I'm about to toot or shoot.

Shooting Star Shot (Triple S)

Fireball shooter that is taken when the shooter is placed at least 1" inside the vagina. Female to Male or Female to Female. Shoot your Shot.

Insert 50 ml + shooter within the vagina, tilt the girl back, and slowly drink the entirety of the shooter while it is inserted in her. Thus, a shooting star has been born.

Take your relationship to the next level with a Shooting Star Shot (Triple S) and take your party tricks to the next level as a couple.

The Shooting Star Shot (Triple S) was not like any other shot I have taken before. It broke all boundaries and it went to the moon.

4👍 1👎

Drunken high gun gun shoot

A game that involves firing a gun indiscriminately after consuming copious amounts of marijuana and alcohol.

Alec: Drunken...high...gun gun...shoot!

23👍 21👎

You'll shoot your eye out

A popular phrase from the movie "A Chiristmas Story" that is first heard by Ralphie's mom when he asks her for a Red Ryder bb gun.

"You'll shoot your eye out, kid."

"Oh, no! I shot my eye out!"

20👍 16👎

national shoot a hair tie day

when you shoot a hair tie from your thumb and it hurts (might get arthritis), and then it hits a computer and slowly but surely types out "monopoly".

yo i got bad early onset arthritis in m 19 year old thumb from national shoot a hair tie day
.

Scoop out ya poop shoot

When you get chocolate ice cream and it looks like when you shit and there’s corn in it but u get 10 scoops of it because it’s the trend

*walks in a ice cream restaurant*
I’ll take the finest scoop out ya poop shoot