Computer

A plastic hunk of shit that pisses off everyone it comes in contact with to no avail. It is the biggest waste of money a person could ever fall victim to, and every nerd who would defend this invention should be shot directly through their temple so as not to miss and leave them paralysed (because even paralysed people can cause problemsStephen Hawkins).

This piece of shit (computer) just crashed, and I lost my entire essay. I fucking hate this pile of fucking shit.

12👍 23👎

computer

A machine designed mainly to play Solitaire and fix endless problems consuming time and money.

<Idioth> I got a computer yesterday!
<Idoith> Luckyyy!! How is it?
<Idioth> Great! Plenty of Solitaire and a crapload of errors!

12👍 26👎

Computer

Your best Friend, the protector of Alpha Complex. Disagreeing is treason.
See also, dictator

Citizen, is the computer your friend?

8👍 13👎

computer

The most frustrating thing that costs you money when ever it breaks.

Guy: Dude i just found out that my comp has 33 viruses

Guy2: Dude your looking at too much porn

6👍 16👎

computer

i love you so much😍

i computer you

1👍 1👎

Computer

A device where you can watch pornos

I want to watch some porn on my computer

1👍 1👎

Computer

A machine used for downloading porn, watching Game of Thrones, downloading porn, and downloading porn.

Brian: I got a new computer, Dave!
Dave: Sweet! What are you gonna do with it?
Brian: Visit incest porn websites.

2👍 5👎