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A daughter's first love and a sons first hero
4👍 2👎
A person who will always love and care for you. They will express their love through higs and kisses, arts and crafts, and just being there for you. No matter what happens, know your dad loves you.
I love you, Dad!
7👍 4👎
- a fucking horny bastard who acts as if he knows the world.
- pretends to be caring and thoughtful + has an devilish conspiracy behind his surface = Dad
- a sick shit who contaminates the definition of "family"
- a dude who forces you to do housework even though your legs are broken (that's my dad)
Dad: Hey you fucking son go cook for me I am godly hungry!
Me: But my legs are broken!
Dad: I don't fucking care you useless piece of shit!
38👍 32👎
DAD, or Dumb Ass Disease, a variant of ADD, or Attention Deficit Disorder. This one however, is much more common, as everybody has at least one friend that suffers from this.
No, really, he's always stupid like that. He's got DAD.
68👍 69👎
The parent that DOESN'T call you a slut and a drug addict and kick you out of the house. The one who doesn't call up their family and tell them you "bashed" them when THEY'RE the one who's pushing YOU while screaming "HIT ME! C'MON HIT ME!". The parent who never lied about lawsuits and restraining orders and where all the money went. The parent who tells you when things go wrong, when he's out of cash for the week, when he drinks too much, when he crashes his car. The parent who admits his mistakes and sets the record straight. The one who takes care of you and makes sure you're doing everything safely. The parent who makes dorky jokes and tells you not to eat so much cookies because he "worked hard to get this gut" and he doesn't want me to look like that. The parent who calls me pathetic and rolls his eyes at me every time he says I smell like an ashtray. The parent who gives me money for coffee and gum and chips and soy sticks, just because I don't want to spend my own shit change. The parent who has always spoiled me and called me silly nicknames. The parent who tells me I've got too much make-up on, because I don't need it. The parent who does what I say. Asks me how to make his chat-site work. The parent who took us in and has a job and does something PRODUCTIVE on the weekend. The parent who's not over-consuming pain medication just because their toe hurt. The parent who lets me have the main bedroom in the house just because I wanted it. The parent who builds me furniture and buys me shelves with anchors and boats from the kids' section, just because I wanted it. The parent who made me act like a (more) sane, normal person rather than an angry, withdrawn person who punched walls and cupboards and threw glass bottles at people. The parent who I never fight with, who I can't be angry at. The parent I LOVE, not the parent I can't even PRETEND to stand to be around. The parent I appreciate, and am thankful to have in my life.
"16 and not yet stangled. Lots of love - Dad." - best one yet.
38👍 37👎
One of the few, if not the only, boy a girl can trust. He's the one who loves playing games with you & goofing off with you while your mom works. He works too, doing manly things like mowing & vacuuming, just not as much as the mother.
He's the old-timey guy who loves board games but also enjoys Mario Kart very much. He stays in the basement watching old western movies & working on puzzles (my family refers to it as the Mancave). He's the one with the stories of when he was a boy that make you smile & always teach a lesson, he's the one who still wants to hold your hand or hug you at the mall, visits video game stores & watches movies frequently, demanding at times, the one you can talk to when your mom's having major mood swings.
The greatest guy ever.
Mom: OAUEHTFAIOSEHBORICQHUE0SIRUHYZIJQBEO!!! D:<
Me: Mmm, looks like Mom's in a mood again.
Dad: Yeah, that's been happening a lot lately. -chuckles- I love your mom, but when she gets angry, -chuckles again- she gets angry.
32👍 34👎
A dad is a person that would go to buy milk and never return
Dad: I'm going to buy milk
Kid: ok
3👍 2👎