A progression from the shocker and surprise, but not quite the mini van. This consists of one up front with three little ones in the back.
After receiving the soccer mom, my girlfriend knew her destiny in life.
11๐ 2๐
Usually a very over protective parent. You can see them at game stored freaking out about games like "Mortal Kombat" or "Call of duty" very annoying and is the whole reason why anmies like DBZ have been so butchered.
Soccer Mom: How can you sell this game with all the blood you are all makeing seriel killers here!
Me: Oh my god I just came in to buy Dead Island!
11๐ 2๐
A blonde middle-aged woman who's spent far too much time at the fake-n'-bake, barely stands five feet tall on her tiptoes, drives an SUV the size of a Sherman tank because she has a female Napoleon complex, and plasters the back of said vehicle with stickers about how her child is a straight A student at <insert here> middle school.
Most of the women driving SUV's around Richmond, VA.
264๐ 121๐
Homemakers who have a whole shitload of kids because they don't know how to use birth control and instead of working, they spend their weeks and summers shuttling them around in their death trap SUV's to their various activities. They're usually extremely protective when it comes to their kids and try to protect them in every way possible.
I refuse to become a soccer mom. I'm having two kids, total and they'll have one activity each.
40๐ 14๐
30-50 year old moms, usually living in the suburbs. They usually have about 2-3 kids, and drive them around everywhere in large ass gas guzzling SUVs with bumper stickers saying "My little fuck of a child is an honor roll student at ____ Middle School". Apparently it's impossible to fit two fucking kids in anything less than a car that seats seven.
They stay at home most of the time, working around the house, hauling their kids everywhere to anything like soccer to fucking astronaut school. Oh, and about their kids: The children of soccer moms are their fucking pride and joy, their "angels". They must have the best grades, be the most popular, be the best at soccer, you name it. The kids must be shielded from anything bad, like the occasional "hell" from that sitcom you watch to sex ed at school. They lack freedom of expression as the moms must not let them be able to do anything exciting in life, because apparently going on the internet turns them in to bad people. Which is funny, because half the time they grow up to be lonely shitholes that die from binge drinking or ODing on drugs. So they are not allowed to watch any TV shows rated over TV-G, can only go on the internet for 30 minutes each week with super parental controls turned on, and cannot play any video games over the rating E, even as teenagers.
Religion: The soccer mom is a hard core christian, and anything that is not 100% christian in any way is considered satanic, like TV shows, and ESPECIALLY music. Yep, they're only allowed to listen to boring country christian music shit.
Soccer moms don't do shit besides destroy the environment, take up space, and raise children totally wrong. Their husbands on the other hand, make $80K a year with some job he's always at, most likely fucking his hot co-worker the whole time.
Fuck soccer moms, they are the scum of this Earth and are a disgrace to the name of freedom and expression.
Look at that soccer mom, what a fucking bitch
27๐ 8๐
A woman who usually wears jeans and tennis shoes, drives a mini-van with a little Jesus fish on the back, and is partly responsible for keeping violent shows off TV and C.D.s with cursings out of the music store. They frequently protest anything that they think will "harm" children and act like pinko commie bastards.
I hate soccer moms!
68๐ 27๐
Contrary to what one would think a soccer mom is not the equivalent of an older football groupie outside North America. They may have secret fantasies about Becks but the name comes from driving their kids to soccer practice in their SUVs or minivans. They are almost always upper middle class or upper class and usually white. They tend to be paranoid about any sort of sex, drugs, smoking, or obscene content in movies or music. Politically speaking they're usually Republicans (although not usually religious right type Repubs, they tend more towards being Giuliani/Bloomberg/Arnold type GOPers) in red areas or they're DLC-type Dems ((i.e. Joe Lieberman, Hillary Clinton) in Dem areas. They usually live in suburbs or exurbs although there are some that live in urban areas.
You know this area changed once the soccer moms moved in and they're trying to close down all the bars and nightclubs because they're scared about their kids.
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