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When you're having a wank, just before blowing the load, shout out "Mom" or "Dad", then try and finish the job before they get into your room!
Me: Jerking off
Brain: Suicide wank time
Me: "Mom! Dad! come here and quick!"
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I couldn't believe it! Julie came home with absolutely wank loads of shopping
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A derogatory term to indicate the subject is as bad as a mark left post masturbation. Therefore something not to be bothered about
"Don't worry about him he's just a wank stain'"
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When you lie on your side and have a cheeky wank, always with your back against the door, so if people walk in you can give them an over shoulder sketchy go away look
Brett: Parmjit was having a side wank the other day
Joel: He disgusts me
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A wank baton is when a group of friends take it in turns to masturbate over internet porn. The first person decides the porno and wanks over said porn until cumming, he then has to tag the next friend in, who has to wank over the same porno and spunk within the defined time of that skin flick. Failure to cum within the given time frame will result in the baton being dropped and a forfeit decided by everybody who has already shot their love gravy.
Dave started the wank baton, but the bastard chose a 2 minute porno. He managed to cum but when Jordan was handed the baton he masturabated so furiously that he snapped his banjo string
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