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The Funniest Thing Your Mom Can Call You.
Mom: You Son Of A Bitch , Ill Kill You!
Me: HaHaHa!
3472👍 431👎
When you're xc skiing and you yell "Track!" but the person in front of you refuses to get out of the way.
Also applies to a person that you do pass, which therefore makes them your bitch.
Marissa: Jane, be careful of that skier up ahead, she's a total track bitch.
Jane: Oh that girl? She's already my track bitch. I passed her at the start of the race.
72👍 5👎
When the boss of a company designates one person to do all the weekend work so he can relax and enjoy the weekends for himself.
Chad : Steve will you come to my office please!
Steve : Hey bud what's up?
Chad : Guess what your getting a promotion!
Steve : O Wow I hope it includes a raise!
Chad : Not exactly you will be our new Weekend Bitch so I can spend more time with my girlfriend Kiersten!
Steve : Hey that's not fair I won't do it!
Chad : Fine I guess your fired!
Steve: Oh no don't do that I guess I will do it!
Chad : Great now go home and don't forget to come back this weekend and work your ass off!
Steve: Ok no problem boss!
42👍 3👎
An overly generic or basic female that follows the majority of trends relevant to her peer group during a specific era, without injecting any originality into her existence. She often lacks the confidence needed to express herself independent of consensus from her peers even though these characteristics may not reflect her true self. A basic bitch takes the safe road rarely taking risks in fashion or other areas of interest. She may or may not view herself as unique; this often depends on her individual role within her social circle.
In 2015 a Basic Bitch can often be spotted wearing Victoria Secret yoga pants tucked into UGG boots or jeans with TOM'S slip-ons with an oversized sweater with an ironic print or design on it, topped with a Northface jacket. She stores her indispensable iphone in her oversize Coach bag along with her knockoff sunglasses and PRINCESS key-fob. She loves nail art as it totally compliments her Pandora bracelet and Tiffany Heart jewelry. She loves foursquare and Instagram and endlessly documents her every outing for Pumpkin Spice Cappuccino from Starbucks on her e-Card ridden Facebook. She loves quoting Marilyn Monroe even if the quotes are wrongly attributed, loves hearts, infinity symbols, dreamcatchers, bacon and mustaches. She knows the words to every song on the radio and would sacrifice her first born to spend one night with John Mayer. She drinks SkinnyGirl cocktails.
Following an intense shopping trip to Target two friends get separated.
Girl 1: "Wow! I thought something happened to you! "
Girl 2: "I couldn't find you either"
Girl 1: "OMG IKR?! EVERY girl looked exactly like you until they turned around"
Girl 2: "SAME!"
Girl 1: "UH The hassle of being Basic Bitches."
Girl 2: "# real-life lolz"
Girl 1: "Let's get Starbucks!"
Girl 2: "A-MAH-ZING idea"
SCENARIO TWO
A guy gets grilled about his new girlfriend.
Guy 1: "So....you're dating MADISON?"
GUY 2: "YEAH"
GUY 1: "Is that Madison with the long Ombre hair and infinity tattoo OR Madison with the Ombre hair and birds on a wire tattoo? "
Guy 2: "NO BRO! Madison with the Ombre hair and the Dreamcatcher Tattoo. I met her at Booty Boot Camp."
Guy 1: "Oh. Well thank god it isn't Madison with the Ombre hair and the Anchor tattoo lmao."
Guy 2: "Seriously! I introduced her to my parents last weekend. "
Guy 1: "Wow. What did they think? "
Guy 2: "They were just so happy that she was a Basic Bitch. "
Guy 1: "I bet they were! "
Guy 2: "What should i get get for her birthday? "
Guy 1: "A Pandora bracelet BRO. Totally original, classic. "
Guy 2: "YOU sure do know a lot about Basic Bitches!"
Guy 1: "Thank you! Let's get Starbucks. "
Guy 2: "DUDE, YES!"
GUY 1: "You
417👍 45👎
Wickedly rude; someone who is bitchy for no reason; uses personal things against people; uses people for personal gain
Nay thinks she's cool, but she's just a heinous bitch.
61👍 4👎
1. Stretch a bitch - Verb. To stretch a woman to her breaking point or until she becomes hostile and unpleasant to be around.
2. Verb. Used by professionals in the field of plastic surgery to refer to face-lift or botox procedures.
3. Verb. Used as a meaningless response to someone explaining their problems when the other person was not listening or does not care
1.
John - Man, did you see Nikki last night?
Mr. Fred - Yeah, Phil sure stretched a bitch when he said she looked fat.
2.
Dr. Cho - What do you have this afternoon?
Dr. Milo - Just stretching a bitch, then I'm going to hit the club.
Dr. Cho - Hah, good man.
3.
Nancy McBoy - I don't know what to do man, what if she doesn't like me?
Tom - I donno man... Stretch a bitch?
Nancy McBoy - Pardon?
Tom - Oh, nothing Nancy, nothing.
originating on twitter, it is a phrase used to point out that a woman is obviously gay
straight person: omg i bet she’s gay i have such a good gaydar
the bitch in question: *kristen stewart* *cara delevingne* ect