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Matt Damon Syndrome

A recently discovered mental disorder with no known cure. Patients have been shown to demonstrate unusual behaviors such has:
1. Getting stuck in somewhere you shouldn't get stuck in (like Mars, a planet in another universe or Nazi territory)
2. Make others risk their lives to save you
3. Tricking others to risk their lives to save you
3. Amnesia
4. Tendency to beat others to death with peculiar objects (eg. Magazines)
5. Having unusually high levels of intelligence
6. Have an unusual tendency to kill Nazis
7. Being exceptionally stubborn
8. Fighting against authoritarian governments
9. Planning elaborate heists
10. Only being able to say your own name

Researchers have not agreed on a single explanation to how it spreads or what causes it, but they have identified several key symptoms. The first patient to be diagnosed with this disorder is Matt Damon.

You may be have Matt Damon Syndrome if you:
1. Lost all your brothers
2. Survived assassination attempt
3. Are an astronaut
4. Your wife is dead
5. Are a horse
6. Are a cowboy
7. Look like Matt Damon

If know someone who displays the above symptoms, call a psychiatrist immediately.

This message has been brought to you by the World National Matt Damon Syndrome Awareness Medical Funding Organization. Donations in cash, check, pay pal, credit card, wire or sexual favors accepted.

Matt's agent: Recently, Matt's been acting strangely. After his wife was killed by the government, he robbed a Casino by pretending he was a janitor. He then used the money to buy a spaceship with a wisecracking robot to fly to Mars. Then he started beating Martian Nazis to death with a magazine shouting "MATT DAMON!" We had to send Tom Hanks to save him, but he only agreed to come home on the condition Tom would dress up as a cowboy and rode him back to the spaceship. But the airlock exploded and he now has Amnesia. By the way, you look like Robin Williams."
Matt's shrink: "Thanks. Well, it seems that Matt suffers from a serious case of "Matt Damon Syndrome". "
Matt's agent: " Oh my god! Come to think of it, he does look kind of like Matt Damon! I wouldn't have known if the WNMDSAMFO didn't tell me about it!"

Matt Damon: "Hi. I'm Matt Damon. You might think Matt Damon Syndrome is a ridiculous disorder. However,it is, unfortunately, a very real disease and over 6 billion children are suffering from it. Since Matt Damon was diagnosed with this disease in 1679, the WNMDSAMFO was founded in 1682 by Matt Damon, aiming to raise awareness and reduce the suffering of those diagnosed with the disorder. If you want to make a difference for those with the disorder, donate to us now. Your philanthropy will be much appreciated by those with the disease. That's 7 billion children. So donate now. This is Matt Damon, over and out."

This message has been brought to you by the WNMDSAMFO.

by Notesarefortheweak October 17, 2015

8πŸ‘ 4πŸ‘Ž


Matt Goodman

A dusty ginger who cant get an offer from loughborough uni, this is due to the fact that his brain is smoother than a formula 1 car's tyres. He has the deadest mullet to exist and it looks like he paid the barber in shillings. Looks like a candle stick who could easily be blown out by the weakest gust of air, which could come from him as his smoker's lungs are weaker than his car's engine.

Ed your such a matt goodman

by lukeC123456 February 7, 2022

1πŸ‘ 5πŸ‘Ž


Matt and claire

the hottest couple fucking ever. if u see a matt and claire u know they have the best relationship ever and should b jealous. they are the hottest most beautiful and smart people ever and u should b scared. matt will always protect and care for his claire so dont even try to speak to her.

Jessica: Oh my god! Is that Matt and Claire there???
Markus: Oh fuck it is them. They look so hot i wish i had what they have.
Lucas: Look theyre making out again! Theyre so obsessed with eachother its amazing!

by claireismine! February 20, 2022

1πŸ‘ 6πŸ‘Ž


matt hitt

so swag, he’s really hot, his name is matt hitt also known as nico’s bf, if you ever meet matt hitt tell him nico said hi.

me: matt hitt is so hot
nico: i prefer guitarists over lead singers ❀️❀️

by remuslupinslover July 7, 2021

1πŸ‘ 5πŸ‘Ž


matt hitt

my husband *REAL*

"matt hitt is my husband" I said.
(1000% true)

by sofiabryantfanpage July 11, 2021

1πŸ‘ 5πŸ‘Ž


Matt Elliott

Matt Elliott will be a person you can tell anything to, no matter what they won’t judge you. They will make you feel happy and your days will be filled with happiness as long as you’re around them. Matt Elliott is the best person ever even if he’s your internet best friend and you can only see him on FaceTime

β€œHe’s there for me, he’s my Matt Elliott”

by Rossthepalaeontologist March 25, 2018

1πŸ‘ 5πŸ‘Ž


matt haney

A political Bro who tries to milk the woke voters by taking and posting selfies of himself all the time. A total selfie, self promoting hoe

You see that politician pull a Matt Haney by showing up to the BLM rally and take/post 10 selfies of himself and leave after 5 minutes so he could go chug IPA’s with his bros while watching a golf tournament.

by TotalRecallSF November 27, 2021

1πŸ‘ 5πŸ‘Ž