Random
Source Code
Random
Short for “squirrelfriend.”
Friend A: Goodmorning Squirrel!
Friend B: Omg hey squirlie!
when a squirrel crosses the street and gets hit.
A squirrel ran across the road, dodged one car, then jumped up and it became a exploding squirrel...because it hit a car of coarse.
Being distracted by something at a moments notice.
Starting a project and something shiny distracts you
I was about to reply to your text but I have squirrel disease
When a man lays on his back while masturbating and attempts to shoot his load up in an arch and catch it in his mouth
"Where's Rob?"
"I don't know, he called in, probably at home catching the flying squirrel "
A red squirrel that lives in a lady's foof and is therefore mouldy from the moistness
Are you going to wash your mouldy squirrel
An Instagram-famous rodent who achieved legend status for his adorable antics and undeniable charm. Peanut was the kind of squirrel who could make even the grumpiest cat crack a smile. Unfortunately, his fame caught the attention of the infamous Karen, a bureaucratic buzzkill who apparently took her role as the Department of Environmental Conservation's ultimate squirrel hater way too seriously. Instead of letting Peanut continue to spread joy, she swooped in like a villain from a bad movie, snatching him from his loving owner, Mark Longo, under the pretense of “regulations.”
In a move that shocked the world, this Karen decided to euthanize Peanut after a tragic mishap, proving once and for all that she’s the ultimate embodiment of government overreach and soul-sucking indifference. Seriously, Karen, what the hell were you thinking? You could’ve just let the little guy live his best life instead of becoming the Grim Reaper of adorable squirrels. Congratulations on being the world’s biggest party pooper—may your days be as joyless as your choices!
"Man, I can’t believe Karen went full villain mode and decided to be the executioner of Peanut the Squirrel; she really just took the joy out of life for everyone!"