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Whilst in the Doggy style postion, and reciever reaching back rubbing the testicles of pitcher, The driver grabs the wrist and ejaculates into it the hand
Don't make me rush it, help me out with a Fortune Teller
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Fortune Cookie Religion describes religious beliefs that are not based on reading religious texts in their entirety but by reading one disjointed verse at a time, as though getting small doses of wisdom akin to a fortune cookie.
The reader then forces that one short verse to apply to their lives and those around them without reading the chapters before or after. This style of religion creates a tendancy for the words to be misinterpretted or taken out of context. Also the reader usually does very little to understand the culture at the time, or other inferences surrounding the time and place that the scripture was written.
In essence it is a shallow religious base comprised of little effort or research on the part of the person. Someone who is Fortune Cookie Religious likes little sayings, quotes, and things with bits of scripture on them, to outwardly show to others that they are religious, but rarely do they read their religious texts themselves. They wait for someone else to tell them what to believe.
Jane's Fortune Cookie Religion involves her reading her Zen Calendar every day.
Tom's made a Fortune Cookie Religion out of reading his horoscope.
Sally's turned reading the Bible into a Fortune Cookie Religion with the way she opens it and points to a random verse, hoping that it will show her the way.
A piece of corn bred with a food stamp baked in the middle of it.
Otis, look at Leroy. He done got himself a nigger fortune cookie on his way back from the liquor store!
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a peice of crap cookie that tastes like cardboard with a peice of paper in it!
Actually the Fortune Cookie was NOT invented in China or Asia!
i was actually invented in san francisco! - the one thing that was not made in china; oh wait they do make it we just invented it!
Girl: When do we get our fortune cookies?
Guy: Why do you want a cookie that tastes like cardboard??
Girl: Because it has a fortune in it.
Guy: Thoses are bull shit, i could tell you your fortune and it would be better that the ones they make up and stick in thoses cookies!
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verb. to help someone in a time of need and support them. to give someone cliche advice that would sound like advice received from a fortune cookie. this advice may seem silly but take it seriously, it WILL help
Jose: I don't know what to do
Kat: the heart wants what the heart wants, let it guide you
Jose: hah, nice fortune cookie-ing
When somebody claims to be smart, but half of the shit they say is obvious and can be found in a fortune cookie.
Asshole - Work hard and you will be okay.
Normal Guy - No shit, thanks for the fortune cookie wisdom, asshat.
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A "fortune cookie" happens when a woman's panties get stuck between her vaginal lips. One must pick the "fortune cookie" out, for it is quite uncomfortable to leave it there. It is also described as a wedgie from the other side.
*Girl digging hand in her pants*
Boy - ehEM.. WHAT are you doing?
Girl - Sorry! I have a fortune cookie going on down there.
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