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A technique used by the morbidly obese at the titty-bar. The fatty stands against the bar during a 'lap-dance' in order to get his junk rubbed against by the stripper. A normal sitting lap-dance causes said fatty's gut to protrude over their penis and block any possible groin stimulation, ending in frustration and a waste of money. This technique has been witnessed anywhere there are fat guys and strippers in the same room.
"When I finish these hot-wings I am going to slide up to the bar and get me a standing lapdance." Said Big John at the Red Carpet Lounge.
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1)
- Used to describe ones state of mind.
- Can be said both in a positive or negative manner.
- One who is off-balance; so to speak.
2)
- Used to describe someone or something that is useless or purposeless.
3)
- In some cases it can be used to describe a person who is useless and at the sametime; mad.
**Originated in the Fylde area of Lancashire, England. Some believe Mr. M. Walolski first used it after leaving a nightclub in Blackpool.
1)
- After a large consumption of alcohol and narcotics; one could describe themselves as being "Hat Stand" or "A Hat Stand".
- Legend has it that Mr. M. Walolski, whilst falling out of a nightclub door said, " For fucks sake, I'm a fucking Hat Stand!" Interesting as he had no hat and couldn't stand.
- "Watch out for him; he's a fucking Hat Stand! He'll kick-off if you just look at his beer"
2)
An Ant Farm is as useless as "A Hat Stand".
3)
George W. Bush
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When you can stand and balance on your penis or cock with no support from anyother limb.
I can do ten cock pushes and a helmet stand!!!!
To take a shit in a washing machine. The owner gets hit twice. Once with the stench and second with having to remove the shit from the machine.
Related to the upper decker. You can get double the points for a front loading machine. You get triple points if you can navigate a stackable machine on your first jump.
This party sucks, lets hit a standing double before we go.
noun
A female who is used by a male to temporarily fill the position of "girlfriend" until a legitimate relationship opportunity presents itself.
The stand-in gf is kept around for the amusement and satisfaction of the male, and so he doesn't get lonely.
The male will often spew phrases such as "I love you" and "I love my girlfriend", though it is and always was his intent to drop said female for one who is actually attractive.
See also: stand-in boyfriend
Chick 1: Check out that ugly hag hanging out with that hottie. He's way out of her league!
Chick 2: Yea she's definitely a stand-in girlfriend, I'm gonna go talk to him.
Whilst standing at the stove cooking some bacon for a hearty breakfast one "serves," i.e. ejaculates in their lady's mouth, who has been on her knees providing oral stimulation. Usually performed by weightlifting types who want all the bacon for themselves and force their lady to have semen for breakfast.
1) I gave my girlfriend the stand and serve this morning before she went to work. She had to get another shower because she was covered in bacon grease and my semen.
2) Lady: Can't you cook something besides bacon while you stand and serve me?
Man: No Slut! I need that protein for my squat tonight!
The way a hooker stands in her heels when she is working one heel up against the wall the other on the ground
Stop using hooker stand out here or otherwise you will be mistaken for a hooker