tell it to my pants pockets

A term that means that you're going to have to show me some money if you want me to do a favor for you. Used to elicit a bribe.

Jesse Jackson, Jr: "Governor Blagojevich, as you can see, I am by far the most qualified candidate to replace President-elect Obama in the U.S. Senate. I hope you will make the right decision."
Rod Blagojevich: "Yeah yeah whatever. Tell it to my pants pockets!"

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These arent even my pants

phrase used to break an awkward silence, or as a way to catch peoples attention

Dude, these arent even my pants

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are you shitting in my pants?!

in disbelief to the fullest extent.

incomprehensible.

Jim: Dude, I just hooked up with your sister!
Jeff: Seriously?! What the hell man! Are you shitting in my pants?!

Jim: >_> <_<... no

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that makes my pants tight

When you see a hottie, or something very nice like a car that you want, its an excellent sentence to describe how you feel about it. Or how whats in your pants feels about it.

Joe: "Dude, look at that Cadillac Escalade."
Alex: "That makes my pants tight."

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I shit my pants

They saying you say when you just shit your pants. The term can also be used as, "I just shit my pants".

Jerry: Hey Thom!
Thom: I shit my pants.

shocked my pants off

to be surprised; astounded; blown away

It shocked my pants off to hear about the 70-year-old lady who gave birth to twins last week!

Pulling my pants down

Phrase used when someone is having a joke/laugh at your expense or taking the piss out of you.

"I'll tell you what Herman, The people at the tax office are pulling my pants down"

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