bumping one off

The act of touching oneself in private places to excite in an effort to achieve climax, or to orgasm. The act is completed when one achieves their orgasm.
Also known as the action of masturbating.

It can be used to describe the process concerning either gender.

Example 1:

Jill: Ew did Tim just bump one off in your bathroom?

Beth: Yeah I think he did - don't go in there.


Example 2:

Guy outside bathroom: Are you done in there? I need to use the bathroom.

Guy in bathroom: Leave me alone, I'm bumping one off!

Off One's Base

adj. A person that is crazy or behaving in idiotic ways

"you are so off one's base"

Crunching one off

A much better way of saying taking a shit or pooping

So there I was in the woods, crunching one off, when I see the biggest fucking black bear ever to exist...

Hussing one off

Masturbating in a fast and noisy fashion while grunting frequently.

James: Lucas, you have been in the bathroom for 2 hours! Why are you grunting so loud?

Lucas: I'm hussing one off! AAAHHHHHH *Splooges everywhere*