security cat

defender of the office, both from threats internal and external

Security Cat issued an office-wide memorandum on proper coffee-making etiquette.

purity security

making sure that everything you do is protecting the purity of others!

we shouldn't be alone rn...purity security!

wank security

When you know your home alone and safe to have a wank

thursdays are the only time a week I get any wank security

Secure The Bag

To get money and be able to keep money. Or to comfortable with the amount of money you sitting on.

"Ay you tryna hit the mall tonight"

"Nah not tonight I'm workin"

"Damn, you always at work"

"You know I gotta secure the bag"

mall security

rent-a-cop

fake pigs

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Security Question

An extra question used for setting up an account somewhere in case you forget your password.

However rather than adding extra security like they think they do, they make your account easier to hack because whilst you may have a great unguessable password, these questions are often easy for someone to guess or even know the answer to.

A sensible person would not give an accurate answer to one of these questions and would in fact have an answer that is as hard to guess as a password.

As an extra security question, Brooklyn Beckham, what is your mother's maiden name?:

Wouldn't be Adams by any chance?

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Social Security

Originally created to help the unfortunate during the Great Depression, it turned into a multi-billion dollar ponzi scheme that will never be voluntarily abolished due to the lobbying power of the AARP and the fact that old people vote more. Social security takes a little over 20% of total expenditures, and the privileged gerontocrats that lived long enough to receive it get three times the amount they paid in the first year of receiving benefits. Most Gen Xers and Millennials will never see a penny of the FICA money they paid in because economists estimate the money from social security will run out by 2030.

Guy 1: "Man, I'll never see a penny of social security money."
Guy 2: "That's because teabagger baby boomers are going to suck off all your hard earned dollars while simultaneously asserting that socialist programs need to stop."

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