knight in bloody armor

A medieval knight in polished shiny plate armor which is now splattered and dripping with the blood and bits of the guts of someone the knight has murdered.
Seeing one of these knights while in battle should instill fear as you might end up painting his armor.

King Arthur, the knight in bloody armor, stabbed his son with Excalibur and the blood came out Mordred's mouth.

That's when William Wallace, the knight in bloody armor, slit open the Queen's chest, revealing her insides. He then removed them, slathering himself in their resplendent glory.

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Armor against society

Another term for clothes. because wearing them helps protect you from arrest, people staring and pointing there finger at you like you were from another planet and all other negative sanctions from society.

I got to ware my armor against society.

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baby body armor

The act of duct taping life-like baby dolls to your body to serve as armor.

Note: Works best with female midget baby dolls as there are smaller "holes" in the armor.

Joe: I have to go back for a second tour in Iraq. I hope the government has given us a fresh supply of baby body armor.

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swiss suit of armor

A sexual act when a group of 30+ men ejaculates on a woman and the woman then waits for the semen to dry. The woman is then incased in a suit made of dry semen.

Yo nigga, me and the football team and the baseball team all got together last night and treated Sooz to a Swiss Suit Of Armor. The bitch couldn't move.

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Subdermal body armor

Armor underneath somebody's skin.

Liquid just got his/her subdermal body armor installed by the government.

knight in shining armor

When your little knight is wearing protection.

Want to see my knight in shining armor or would prefere him fighting without protection?

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make believe armor

The imaginary armor for a man that protects him from false “me too” accusations and/or abuse from women.

Very similar to a customer service face, make believe armor helps men interact with women and navigate the treacherous world of women’s rights.

While wearing make believe armor men can interact and simply talk with women without fear of reprisal or false accusations.

Typically make believe armor is worn at social activities such as dancing and parties but can and should probably be worn in the workplace or even at home.

While wearing make believe armor men are only able to talk about subjects that nothing sexual, sexist or overly masculine undertones or microaggressions can be taken away from ie the weather, sports stats, Wild Animal facts, and marinade recipes. Also things that are very technical like database building or power generation or ballistics.

*Make believe armor doesn’t actually exist except in the mind of a man or in other men.

“Hey Ma’am ”
“Hey Sir”

“The sun has reached it’s zenith and the temperature is warmer”
“Would you say it is hot?”
“No Ma’am I would not, because I’m wearing my make believe armor, I would say it’s certainly not cold”

“Dude won’t even talk about anything but the third law of thermodynamics to that girl, he’s wearing his make believe armor”

“I’m sorry Jill I would ask you to dance, but I’m wearing my make believe armor so what do you think of Tom Brady’s completion record?”

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