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Loss Prevention Officer

A Professional, Human Resources, or Politically Correct version of a term used to refer to a security guard or rent-a-cop for a retail or department store.

"I just got hired to be Target's new Loss Prevention Officer!"
"You know that's just a security guard position right?"
"Fuck! I thought it was a real job."

by jiggadigga February 21, 2007

57๐Ÿ‘ 130๐Ÿ‘Ž


wins losses ties

a.k.a. "ratio"

The ratio used to describe how many women a gentleman has poked in the butt, cooch, and both, respectively.

Pat: Damn, dude. Your ratio is beginning to dwindle because you keep fucking these chicks straight up. What's your wins losses ties at now?

Brendan: 1:3:4

Pat: Now we've gotta hire three chicks before your wedding for anal only just to get you back up to an even level!

by jose punk January 15, 2008

3๐Ÿ‘ 4๐Ÿ‘Ž


i loss you

to say i love you &i miss you in a shorter form. L O being the two beginning letters of love and S S being the two ending letters of miss.

i loss you right now baby

by KiiNX April 27, 2007

7๐Ÿ‘ 23๐Ÿ‘Ž


Sorry for your loss

Basically Sorry for your loss means when a girl/guy is no longer single to do anything

Girl 1: oh did you hear Jesse is taken?
Girl 2: what a shame.
*Jesse walks by*
Girls: sorry for your loss!!!

by Unknown_Ari April 24, 2018

3๐Ÿ‘ 11๐Ÿ‘Ž


Short Dick Memory Loss

One who can not retain information due to a lack of a properly sized penis.

Lore- It's said that these people think with their second head because their actual head is smoother than a bald man's head fresh out of a wax job.

A person diagnosed with SDML is known to forget information attained in the last 10 minutes. The time in which someone loses information often varies depending on how small the penis is. People with smaller penises usually ranging from just tip to 2 inches have shown that they forget way more frequently and will have to ask you to repeat what you said numerous times.

SIDE EFFECTS- No Bitches and possibly no friends
EARLY SIGNS- You can catch early signs of SDML when you measure your penis and it's smaller than 4 inches.
TREATMENTS- None (sorry to break it to ya, hope you got mone cause you ain't pulling shit)

Person 1: Tims's annoying asf, bro keeps saying what.

Person 2: Give him a break, he has Short Dick Memory Loss.

by TheRealZeusypoo March 29, 2022


Data Loss Denial (DLD)

The mental states that a computer owner goes through when the only copy of data is lost. For instance, a hard drive that contains family pictures from the last 5 years which has never been backed up suddenly dies, the owner will go through several stages of denial that the data has been actually lost and cannot be recovered.

A classic case of Data Loss Denial (DLD):

"It was 230am. I had been staring at the clicking hard drive for 6 hours non-stop, as if my very retinal gaze would be able to pull the 700GB of lost JPGS back to life thru the steel sides of the hateful beast. I started to scream, then wail like a banshee from "LOTR part 5". "FUCK!!! FUCK FUCK!!!! FUCK ME!!!! FUCK ME!!!! DIE DIE DIE DIE!!!!!" I screamed over and over and over. The walls shook. The kids awoke in terror and cried. My wife grabbed the phone and started to dial 911. I wrenched the phone from her hands and screamed "YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND. YOU DON'T! That was 700 hundred FUCKING JIGGABYTES OF OUR LIVES!!!!!!!!! And now its GONE!!!!!!!". I grabbed the black metal rectangle of clicking death and ran downstairs. I started to throw it over the back fence. Then I stopped. I thought, hmmmmm, maybe, just maybe, if I hook it back to that SATA cable, just one more time?? And power cycle again? Yeah, that'll do it. Lets go try again....."

by Chuckles759 February 3, 2010


Rapid Weight Loss Center

euphemism for using the toilet, especially "sitting down."

Boss: "Dave, where'd you go after you punched in?"

Dave: "Sorry, boss, I had to stop by the Rapid Weight Loss Center."

by Deester May 24, 2007