Random
Source Code
Random
A Morning Coma is when a person wakes up and for a few seconds and/or minutes forgets where they are, what time it is, and what day it is.
I had to give Ethan the time, date, and day of the week because he had such a bad Morning Coma after waking up.
A sip of coffee followed immediately by a bump of coke off a lactating women's breast and then a suck of milk.
Being a dad isn't so bad when you can start your day with a morning Blend.
The painful but somewhat stimulating anal sensation you experience the morning after eating too many of the hottest buffalo wings the bar offers (e.g., BWW's Blazers). Some Indian food can have the same effect but usually it is only from some very irresponsible sadistic joker.
Steve: "Try these wings, they burn more coming out than going in."
Joe: "meh, they're not so bad but I can tell from the smell that they prolly are morning afterburners."
Extreme nausea and vomiting.
A condition associated with morning sickness.
A sign of being pregnant.
My girlfriend has been suffering from morning cookies for a few days now.
33👍 5👎
The sound you hear when you go to hell. So basically it's this song that you can use for your alarm on like your phone or something but it's freaky AF. Some people like it, some people hate it. And I'm one of those people who hate it, and now I have it stuck in my head. Thanks, Satan! :)
Tomorrow was the big test, and Sarah was ready. She spent many days studying for it, and now, she was prepared. She set her alarm for 6:00 am and fell asleep confident and determined to pass this test.
An hour passed and her annoying little brother Jake snuck into her room and changed her alarm to Morning Flower at full volume hoping for her to have a bad day because she ate his leftover food from Chipotle.
*The next day*
It was a minute before 6 o'clock and Sarah was still asleep, waiting to be waken by her alarm. The clock hit 6:00 and Morning Flower blasted from her phone. Sarah woke up in shock and then felt a little bit of fear. That fear soon turned into the urge to go jump off a cliff. She started crying and turned off the alarm. She didn't want to go to school. She didn't care about the test. Her whole day was ruined, and for the rest of her life, she lived with PTSD... THE END
Damn, all of that just to show how terrifying that song is? Makes sense...
28👍 5👎
To do this wonderfully hilarious trick the male must engage in sexual activity WITH HIS MORNING WOOD. While engaged in sexual activity (preferably oral sex), the male must have glitter of his choice of color in his hand. When the male reaches the pinnacle of his orgasm, before ejaculating, must make a valiant effort to excrete his penile fluids onto the woman's face. Using the penile fluids as a form of glue, the male then slaps the woman across the face with his glitter hand. As the male slaps the woman, the excess glitter will fly up into the air, while the others will stick to the female's face. Laughter ensues.
1. When Theresa and I had such crazy sex that she fell asleep last night, I decided to wake her up this morning with a Morning glow.
2. Since my roommate Vivian ate all the Chinese food and deleted all my porn, i decided to get some glitter and give her a Morning glow before she went to school.
3. I gave Linda a Morning glow because she was begging for it. Who cares if shes my sister?
146👍 36👎
Waking up and discovering various fruit, pastries, and/or cereal covering your body (primarily genitals) with no recollection of consuming and/or purchasing sed items; the name originating from Post Blueberry Morning Cereal.
Hey Joe, what did we do last night? I woke up with my balls covered in a McDonald's parfait...what a blueberry morning.
13👍 1👎