dirty newton

A Kid who has a Massive Cock And is not gay

Dirty Newton is so hot.

Isaac Newton

So you're fucking a girl in an apple orchard and she's got her back up against a tree. Then you really start taking down to pound town, so much so that apples fall from the tree and hit her on the head.

Dude, I went apple picking with my girlfriend's family, but she and I went off on our own. Long story short, I ended up giving her an Isaac Newton.

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jizz newton

ejaculating high above head then having it splash down upon yourself

what happened
jizz newton

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Kathryn newton

A really awesome actor who can make any type of movie watchable

And also a very good looking actress especially in her movies

Freaky and the tiny map of perfect things
And can't stop thinking about her after watching her movies

Bro you see kathryn newton in that new movie
Yah she was really good in it

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fig newton

a word often used to refer to black and mild cigars because they taste somewhat of the fig newton cookie

i wish this fig newton would never end

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The Fig Newton

Dancing The Fig Newton or doing the Fig Newton refers to the "dance" one does when going through drug withdrawal, namely heroin, or oher opiates. The "dance" is usually done in a bed, with the covers tightly pulled over ones head, and usually includes leg kicking movements, rolling around in bed, and the constant sitting up and lying down again that comes with the uncomfortability of heroin withdrawal. The Fig Newton is traditionally danced in a pool of one's own sweat, and is usually accompanied by the traditional soundtrack of constant moaning, and occasional soft cries and/or whimpers.

I know I haven't seen you guys in a while, but I've been trying to quit this shit, and I spent the last 4 days doing the fig newton in my fucking room.

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Fag Newton

A homosexual friend that shows up to a location with baked goods (your house, a party, a picnic, etc).

Why? Because a cookie is just a cookie, but Fag Newtons are fruits with cake.

Husband: The neighbor came over last night. He brought us some cupcakes.
Wife: What a Fag Newton.

Gay Guy 1: We're going over to the neighbors' tonight.
Gay Guy 2: Should we take anything with us?
Gay Guy 1: Don't be a Fag Newton.

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