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1. a preternatural being, commonly believed to be a reanimated corpse that bites your dick instead of your neck.
2. a woman who unscrupulously exploits, ruins, or degrades the men she seduces.
3. a cocksucker
Jake: blah I vant to suck your dick! (lol)
Johnny: oh shit! Jake’s a penis vampire!!!
Duke: but there are no bite marks on his neck, how can this be happing?
Johnny: it was Emily, that bitch she bit his dick and turned him into a undead cocksucker.
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A contest of wills fought by two men slapping their dicks against one another until one man becomes erect, at which point he loses, because he is gay (no offense.)
Often accompanied by the chant, "1-2-3-4! Let's have a penis war!"
Tom: "Did you hear? Ryan and Raul are going to have a penis war."
Brent: "I'm pretty sure that means they're BOTH gay."
Tom: "Oh."
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<noun>
1. A sexual act; only able to be performed in total darkness.
The male penetrates the female's vagina with an object that resembles a penis (dildo, cucumber, banana, etc.); while doing so, the male makes loud and convincing "grunts" and "moans."
Within minutes, the male then suddenly falls out of the bed and "screams," leaving the penis-like object inside of the female.
When performed correctly, the female will panic, scream, and in some occasions faint, thinking the male's penis has "fallen off."
2. A male who has leprosy, and whose penis can literally detach.
1. "No, Cherise didn't get beat up last night. Clint just pulled the detachable penis on her, and she fainted right into the headboard."
2. "Jesus Christ!" <runs from the bedroom>
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The average penis is anywhere from 5-6.5 inches in length and 4.5-5 inches in girth (around, circumference) when erect. Flaccid length varies, so any measurements of a flaccid penis doesn't really reveal any information.
Friend 1: I am sad because my penis is only 5 inches long!
Friend 2: Man, don't worry, nerves in women usually only go about three inches past the vaginal opening, there's a reason most men are 5-6 inches long- any more is practically a waste of space! It's fine, you have an average penis.
Friend 1: Yay! Also, I'm only 3 inches around!
Friend 2: Well, that just sucks.
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a long thick penis usually measures 7 inches and above
"that colombian dude from the club tottaly streched me out last night"
"I sure love that colombian penis, they fuck the best"
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The definition of "Skinny Penis" is a with ass dude on the internet saying " It's ya boi, skinny penis." That exact video made me a different person with magical powers. I can now make my penis wipe my own ass. Oh yeah almost forgot, if u watch the video 200 times your white af peepee turns black, and shrinks 40x . Best day of my life when that happened.
Hiesenburg: "Say my name.."
Some random ass person: "It's ya boi, skinny penis."
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a penis that a girl grows every month but is cut off to prevent it becoming sore
‘hey bro did you know girls grew girl penises?!’
‘nah! i wonder if they’re bigger than ours!’
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