Random
Source Code
Random
To get out of everything when you are a foreigner
Police: "sir, you were going 100 mph in a 20 mph zone. I need you to take you to custody"
Me: " you know english is my second language, right?"
Police: "oh you are fine then. Have a good day!"
Person 1: "Dude! Why didnt you invite me to the party you threw? I thought I was one of your closer friends!!"
Person 2: "Dude! you know english is my second language, right?"
Person 1: "Oh nevermind then! we are cool!"
1👍 3👎
Announcer: "A NUKE LAUNCH AT YOUR FUCKING COUNTRY IN 10 SECONDS! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!"
Family: *confused screaming*
2👍 2👎
'Nuff said.
Pretty much the same as your face or your mom. Can be used for any type of situational comeback that you can possibly think of with a touch of...elongated flair.
Person 1: You don't look so good.
Person 2: YOUR FACE'S SECOND MOTHER'S DAUGHTER'S GREAT AUNT'S COUSIN'S DIVORCED WIFE'S BAKA USAGI OF A ROOMMATE DOESN'T LOOK SO GOOD!!!
Person 1: . . . *walks away*
20👍 4👎
A person so hairy, that when they take their shirt/sweater off, it looks like they have a shirt/sweater on.
Look at that dude! It's 100 degrees out and he's totally rockin' the second sweater!!!
The worst guard shift in the world. It means that you get to be up in the early hours of the morning and when you go back to sleep you only get about 2 hours.
Hey man, I got put on second relief tonight...
Someone who, in relation to others, has zero parents, zero grandparents and five great-grandparents in common.
Irregular-triple-second-cousin.
Living being that has zero parents, zero grandparents and five great-grandparents in common with other living beings.
irregular-triple-second-cousin.