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1. Do not talk about /b/
2. Do NOT talk about /b/
3. We are Anonymous.
4. Anonymous is legion.
5. Anonymous does not forgive, Anonymous does not forget.
6. Anonymous can be horrible, senseless, uncaring monster.
7. Anonymous is still able to deliver.
8. There are no real rules about posting.
9. There are no real rules about moderation either — enjoy your ban.
10. If you enjoy any rival sites — DON'T.
11. You must have pictures to prove your statement.
12. Lurk moar — it's never enough.
13. Nothing is Sacred.
14. Do not argue with a troll — it means that they win.
15. The more beautiful and pure a thing is, the more satisfying it is to corrupt it.
16. There are NO girls on the internet.
17. A cat is fine too.
18. One cat leads to another.
19. The more you hate it, the stronger it gets.
20. It is delicious cake. You must eat it.
21. It is delicious trap. You must hit it.
22. /b/ sucks today.
23. Cock goes in here.
24. You will never have sex.
25. ????
26. PROFIT!
27. It needs more Desu. No exceptions.
28. There will always be more fucked up shit than what you just saw.
29. You can not divide by zero (just because the calculator says so).
30. No real limits of any kind apply here — not even the sky
31. CAPSLOCK IS CRUISE CONTROL FOR COOL.
32. EVEN WITH CRUISE CONTROL YOU STILL HAVE TO STEER.
33. Desu isn't funny. Seriously guys. It's worse than Chuck Norris jokes.
34. There is porn of it. No exceptions.
35. If no porn is found of it, it will be created.
36. No matter what it is, it is somebody's fetish. No exceptions.
37. Even one positive comment about Japanese things can make you a weeaboo.
38. When one sees a lion, one must get into the car
39. There is furry porn of it. No exceptions.
40. The pool is always closed due to AIDS (and stingrays, which also have AIDS).
41. If there isn't enough just ask for Moar.
42. Everything has been cracked and pirated.
43. DISREGARD THAT I SUCK COCKS
44. The internet is not your personal army.
45. Rule 45 is a lie.
46. The cake is a lie.
47. If you post it, they will cum.
48. It will always need moar sauce.
49. The internet makes you stupid.
50. Anything can be a meme.
51. Longcat is looooooooooong.
52. If something goes wrong, Ebaums did it.
53. Anonymous is a virgin by default.
54. Moot has cat ears, even in real life. No exceptions.
55. CP is awwwright, but DSFARGEG will get you b&.
56. Don't mess with football.
57. MrSpooky has never seen so many ingrates.
58. Anonymous does not "buy", he downloads.
59. The term "sage" does not refer to the spice.
60. If you say Candlejack, you w
61. You cannot divide by zero.
62. The internet is SERIOUS FUCKING BUSINESS.
63. If you do not believe it, then it must be habeebed for great justice.
64. Not even Spider-Man knows how to shot web.
65. Mitchell Henderson was an hero to us all.
66. This is not lupus, it's SPARTAAAAAAAAAA.
67. One does not simply shoop da whoop into Mordor.
68. Katy is bi, so deal w/it.
69. LOL SIXTY NINE AMIRITE?
70. Also, cocks.
71. This is a showdown, a throwdown, hell no I can't slow down, it's gonna go.
72. Anonymous did NOT, under any circumstances, tk him 2da bar|?
73. If you express astonishment at someone's claim, it is most likely just a clever ruse.
74. If it hadn't been for Cotton Eyed Joe, Anonymous would have been married a long time ago.
75. Around Snacks, CP is lax.
76. All numbers are at least 100 but always OVER NINE THOUSAAAAAND.
77. Hal Turner definitely needs to gb2/hell/.
78. Mods are fucking fags. No exceptions.
79. All Caturday threads will be bombarded with Zippocat. No exceptions.
80. No matter how cute it is, it probably skullfucked your mother last night.
81. That's not mud.
82. Steve Irwin's death is really, really funny.
83. The Internet is SERIOUS FUCKING BUSINESS.
84. Rule 87 is true.
85. Yes, it is some chickens.
86. Bobba bobba is bobba.
87. Rule 84 is false. OH SHI-
88. If your statement is preceded by "HAY GUYZ", then you are not doing it right.
89. If you cannot understand it, it is machine code.
90. Anonymous still owes Hal Turner one trillion U.S. dollars.
91. Spengbab Sqarpaint is luv Padtwick Zhstar iz fwend.
92. Disregard Bigmike, he sucks cocks.
93. Secure tripcodes are for jerks.
94. If someone herd u liek Mudkips, deny it constantly for the lulz.
95. Combo breakers are inevitable. If the combo is completed successfully, it is gay.
96. I am a huge faggot. Please rape my face.
97. Shit sucks and will never be stickied.
98. Bricks must are required to be shat whenever Anonymous is surprised.
99. If you have no bricks to shit, you are made of fail and AIDS.
100. ZOMG NONE
101. SHE MUST FALL OFF CHAIR NAO. (TITS ARE ACCEPTED)
L7: RULE 101 BITCH
Poopscoop: THERES ONLY 100 RULES of the internet, STOP LIEING
L7: CHECK URBAN DICTIONARY
Poopscoop: ohhhhh shi- *Falls of chair*
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Often assumed by people who have weak knowledge of modern technology and/or the internets. Sometimes used by people who do have knowledge of the internets to make fun of those who do not.
Old Man: Lets book our holiday online Ethel
Old Woman: *types*
Old Man: Oh no, looks like you broke the internet!
Ethel (Previously Old Woman): Oh noes!
Young Man: lol
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There are a few situations where one could yell this phrase, but the main thing is to convey sarcasm. For example if someone you know says something that seems utterly useless in a tone where they're trying to sound like it's the news of the year (and it really isn't), then you'd say this phrase in reply. See alert the media.
(instant messenger convo)
Joe: holy shit dude omg i just asked out sally and she said yes *random emoticon* oh man shes so hawt
Jack: ZOMG ALERT THE INTERNET!!!~ lol dude i dont care shes prolly gonna hump u and dump u rofl
Joe: stfu *angry face* ur just jealous cuz u didnt get her u have no balls
Jack: maybe i should alert teh internet that ur a total douche lol
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A tongue-in-cheek phrase used by non-technical users to describe a way of getting more out of the Internet than typically allowed by the ubiquitous hobbling, trial periods, deliberate limitations and otherwise malevolent crippling of software for unwarranted or undeserved commercial gain.
"Last night we figured out a way to hack the Internet good when we used Skype and MSN together for free multi-party videoconferencing."
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A child raised by the internet, they only speak text. They care about not having the most recent tech. They have almost every social media account
Guy 1: Man i think this was an internet baby
Guy 2: What gave her away
Guy 1: She was blabbing about Taylor Swift and kept saying LOL
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The new unfunny version of Encyclopedia Dramatica. Instead of hilarious lies it now contains actual facts, which are not funny.
Instead of reading about how jews did wtc, you can now read about how a fundamentalist islamic terrorist group did it, hooray.
why would i want to go on oh internet when i could go on wikipedia instead?
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When the maximum boredom level has been reached and you type something into Google such as:
asdasd
asdf
qwertyuiop
asdfghjkl
zxcvbnm
Along those lines...
Tyler was breaking the internet when I looked at his history:
asdasd
asdf
pornhub,com
qwertyuiop
asdfghjkl
zxcvbnm
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