Jog and Flog

When someone is caught lurking and jerking they must make a timely getaway, thus resulting in an unfortunate jog and flog.

Phil: Why the hell are you all out of breath and sweating profusely?

Pat: just got caught doing a lurk and jerk at the mall.

Phil: that still doesn't explain why you're so sweaty...

Pat: mall security caught me behind the tanks at the pet store, so i had to pull a quick jog and flog all the way to the bus stop.

3👍 1👎

possum flogging

Trying to wake up a whiskey dick. So named for the dead, unresponsiveness of a whiskey dick (playing possum) and the vigorous assault one makes on said dick in an attempt to wake it up.

Went home from the bar with some skank and was possum flogging for half an hour trying to get it up!

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Flog the dummy

To manually stimulate the male member. Masturbate.

After striking out at the Disco, Chad went home to flog the dummy.

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Flogging Molly

A Celtic punk band in the spirit of the Pogoues. They sound terrific and are great listening and dancing for all (except the Brits). My family came over because of the "potato blight" and ALSO because their home was burned down in front of their eyes because they were behind on ONE MONTH of rent to the "land lord--brit". They saw many of their neighbors and even family die from hunger by the very same roads the brit's used everyday carrying large amounts of food to other wealthy and titled land owners. There is, unfortunately, much for Irish people to be bitter about. I feel happy that there is some peace there but it does not take away the hole in my heart left by my family being forced to leave the land they loved. I have never felt "comfortable" in America. Yet, I will never see Ireland. I am thinking of putting in my will to be buried there...

irish nationalismflogging molly

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flog the log

see friggin in the riggin

Whatever flogs your log!

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Flogging Molly

Slang term for masturbation #479,306.

"What are you doing in there? Are you flogging Molly again?!"

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flog-nosticate

Aging sex addict who can’t keep up with the new trends of kinky sex. Flog-nosticators are prone to being side tracked and forgetting shit.

Usually resulting in suicide by strangulation.

I was watching some serious porn last night and was enjoying it the. I went to check the frozen pizza in the oven. I forgot to turn it off and the wife came home and saw what I was watching.

I’ve seen my life go bye so fast but I know that I’ve become a flog-nosticator
I told myself to never flog-nosticate